I don't win enough of these - were I to do so then I might remember how to set up this poll!

Question:
Please cast your votes, ladies and gentlemen.

1.
When Richard’s turn came he chose Hove
Not replete with a lexical trove
I had a tough time
Finding words that would rhyme
So I strive, I have striven, I strove.

2.
I arranged to meet her near to Hove
In a secluded and quite secret cove
But sadly I missed
The time of our tryst
Couldn’t find it! Believe me, I strove.

3.
At an EFL college in Hove,
“Is it thrived”, asked the student, “or throve?”
“This English is tough,
Far too much of this stuff
Seems contrived, or should that be controve?”

4.
Twas brillig in the town of Hove,
When uffish crept a slithy tove.
He gimbled there beneath some thatch
And barbecued a Bandersnatch,
Then left its carcass on the stove.

5.
As I motored to Brighton and Hove
A careening, bikini-clad drove
Of holiday nutters
With beach balls and putters
Nearly forced me off into the cove!

6.
Whene'er I sunbathe down in Hove
My jaunty eyes gleefully rove
O'er flesh as it trembles
And gyres and gambols
'Cross the brillig sand of Nudist Cove.

7.
I once took a 'copter to Hove
(Most summers, I simply drove)
Do you 'loave' as a lover?
If you rove you're no 'ruvver'--
But I hovered when just over Hove.

8.
Blackbeard anchored his ship off of Hove
And his men rowed the gold through its cove.
In a hole sank their treasure
And then, for good measure,
He buried his mates in the grove.

9.
A haggard old hobo from Hove,
Where one time he stridently strove
To be a great cook -
Until he mistook
The syrup for stock on the stove.

10.
I've a beautiful place out in Hove
That's nestled beside a small cove.
I brought up my beau;
In his ears I did blow
And into his arms I just dove!

Choices:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.

 

I wish we could have two votes because I had to do "eeny, meeny, miney moe"...two of them were tied in my eyes.

The real problem is that there are presently too few voters. Mind you, I suppose we could contrive some kind of transferable vote system (I am joking!).

Come on everybody.
Vote for me!

If elected I promise two chickens in every garage.*

Actually The Tubes promised it first but I didn't get where I am today by not stealing good ideas.

quote:

If elected I promise two chickens in every garage.*

Actually The Tubes promised it first but I didn't get where I am today by not stealing good ideas.

I beleive it was "a cicken in every pot and a car in every garage" during the Hoover election campaign in 1928.

Ah, but only the Tubes promised you two chickens!

And I promise root and branch reform.
I promise to shine the light of integrity into the dark corners of corruption.
I promise peace and prosperity and wars only with very small countries who won't fight back.
I promise free chicken soup for everybody.
I promise a land where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking and all the children are above average.*
I promise that in brightest day, in blackest night no evil shall escape my sight.**


And...

oh, you don't know which I wrote, do you?

Ah well, vote anyway.

*Stolen from Garrison Keillor
** And that one's Green Lantern

quote:

Ah, but only the Tubes promised you two chickens!

But they don't give you the pot. And I loathe raw chicken, especially the lips.

Give a man a chicken in a pot and he has one meal.

Give a man two chickens in a garage and he can live on the eggs for a year. Although it might not be a very well balanced diet...

I didn't mean to egg you n.

There's a clear leader at the moment, but I'll wait for a few days to see whether there are any more votes. I won't vote myself unless there is a need for a tie-breaker.

So if there is a clear leader when you announce the winner, let us know which one you would have chosen.

I will do that.

Only five votes so far - any more, please?

Ah well. Maybe just take the five and go onto the next word.

Well, it looks as though five is all we're going to get and so here are the details of the submissions, grouped by author:

1.
When Richard’s turn came he chose Hove
Not replete with a lexical trove
I had a tough time
Finding words that would rhyme
So I strive, I have striven, I strove.

2.
I arranged to meet her near to Hove
In a secluded and quite secret cove
But sadly I missed
The time of our tryst
Couldn’t find it! Believe me, I strove.

3.
At an EFL college in Hove,
“Is it thrived”, asked the student, “or throve?”
“This English is tough,
Far too much of this stuff
Seems contrived, or should that be controve?”

Bob Hale


4.
Twas brillig in the town of Hove,
When uffish crept a slithy tove.
He gimbled there beneath some thatch
And barbecued a Bandersnatch,
Then left its carcass on the stove.

Geoff


5.
As I motored to Brighton and Hove
A careening, bikini-clad drove
Of holiday nutters
With beach balls and putters
Nearly forced me off into the cove!

6.
Whene'er I sunbathe down in Hove
My jaunty eyes gleefully rove
O'er flesh as it trembles
And gyres and gambols
'Cross the brillig sand of Nudist Cove.

7.
I once took a 'copter to Hove
(Most summers, I simply drove)
Do you 'loave' as a lover?
If you rove you're no 'ruvver'--
But I hovered when just over Hove.

Bethree 5

8.
Blackbeard anchored his ship off of Hove
And his men rowed the gold through its cove.
In a hole sank their treasure
And then, for good measure,
He buried his mates in the grove.

Proofreader


9.
A haggard old hobo from Hove,
Where one time he stridently strove
To be a great cook -
Until he mistook
The syrup for stock on the stove.

Greg S


10.
I've a beautiful place out in Hove
That's nestled beside a small cove.
I brought up my beau;
In his ears I did blow
And into his arms I just dove!

Kalleh

So the clear winner is limerick number three, penned by Bob. And, had I voted, that would have been my choice because of its clever wordplay. But congratulations everyone who wrote and now it's back to Bob for another destination.

I liked #3, too, but I voted for Bob's #1. Good job, Robert!

I'll post a new location then.

(And btw apart from my own vote there was one other that wasn't for me. I'll track you down. Be afraid. Be very afraid.)

Clearly it was someone who had a slight preference for my alliterations, over your cleverness. I didn't vote, because I would have voted for your cleverness (No. 3) myself, and that would have blown mine out of the water.

Oh wait a minute - perhaps that was you that voted for mine, so nobody really liked my alliterations after all. Bummer.

it was, alas, me that voted for yours. I thought that it was fourth best (after my three).

The rest of us all know where we stand in your eyes, Bob.