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Limerick Poll: Kohler Login/Join
 
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Picture of Kalleh
posted
Here is the poll for Kohler - remember, this is Shu's game. Select your favorite!

*** These have now been re-jiggered to put the sequential limericks together, but you can still vote for them singly. There had been one vote when I started this, though when you edit all votes are lost. Will the person who voted for the old #1, please re-vote? I believe that limerick now is # 7. Oy vey, nothing is easy these days. Wink

Question:
The first 3 limericks (1-3) are sequential, though can be voted on separately:

1. A slender young woman in Kohler
As the nights in winter grew colder
Thought a man I will wed
To snuggle in bed
And so she grew bolder and bolder.

2. The man watched the woman in Kohler
Grow bolder and bolder and bolder
He thought he would woo
But he hadn’t a clue
So, he flew her to somewhere more polar.

3. Fed up with the winter in Kohler
“Let’s try somewhere more solar
Lie in the sun
Have loads of fun"
The agent worked hard and he sold her.

4. I hear engineers up in Kohler
Have designed a commode which is solar -
Provides A/C and heat
And massages your feet -
And replaces your standard One-Holer.

5. There was an old lady of Kohler
Who shat in a stinky two-holer
'Till a comic caught wind
Now she parks her rear end
On porcelain. Thanks, Amy Poehler!

6. A gentleman dined at the Kohler
Clad only in spats and a bowler
The ladies all screamed
The waiters just beamed
For he was a well-known high roller.

7. He said that we met in Kohler
And I had been somewhat colder
“Yes, we met in the spa
Where you took off your bra”
He was that sophomoric ogler.

8. A hooker who turned tricks in Kohler
Thought she'd found a well-hung high-roller
But was disappointed to find
He'd referred to his mind
When he said of himself. "I'm bipolar".

9. I once saw a woman in Kohler
Who was pushing a very large stroller
And she said, "For my sins
I've been 'gifted' with twins
And that's why my pram's a two-holer!"

10. The American Club is in Kohler;
'Twas built by a brilliant comptroller
For immigrant workers,
Who surely weren't shirkers.
('Twouldn't happen today - we're bipolar.)

11. An unrestrained co-ed from Kohler
Was a wild child - we could not control her,
But a condom defective
Has changed her perspective
To diaper bag, bottle and stroller.

12. I once knew a bowler from Kohler
Of whose game I am not an extoller.
He once threw a strike
That bounced - took a hike
And flew backwards, and cracked off his molar.

Choices:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.

 

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Kalleh,
 
Posts: 24735 | Location: Chicago, USAReply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of Kalleh
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Ah well, I tried to be organized and get these out in time, but that got me nowhere. It seems one of the contestants sent limericks that should have followed each other, and I separated them. Sorry about that! I will re-jigger (as my statistician calls it when I ask him to look at things differently) at lunchtime today. Any votes will be deleted, so please vote again once I have re-jiggered. Please don't vote until then, if you are intending to vote now. I'll let you know. So sorry! Roll Eyes
 
Posts: 24735 | Location: Chicago, USAReply With QuoteReport This Post
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Okay, folks, the sequential limericks are now in place. Will the person who voted for the old #1 (now #7), please re-vote as your vote was lost?

I think these are very fun! I really like some of the rhymes, as well as the ideas.
 
Posts: 24735 | Location: Chicago, USAReply With QuoteReport This Post
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More votes please!

One of mine is very mundane, but the other deserves at least one vote, I think. Wink
 
Posts: 24735 | Location: Chicago, USAReply With QuoteReport This Post
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I can't vote twice, nor can I change my vote. If I could I would. I woulda voted for #8 had the author written, "saddened," not "disappointed,"thereby making lines three and four match rhythmically. #11 tries to rhyme "Kohler" with "control her." To me it doesn't rhyme, yet I voted for it. I'm an idiot! Throw my vote out!
 
Posts: 6168 | Location: Muncie, IndianaReply With QuoteReport This Post
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Picture of BobHale
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quote:
Originally posted by Geoff:
I can't vote twice, nor can I change my vote. If I could I would. I woulda voted for #8 had the author written, "saddened," not "disappointed,"thereby making lines three and four match rhythmically. #11 tries to rhyme "Kohler" with "control her." To me it doesn't rhyme, yet I voted for it. I'm an idiot! Throw my vote out!


rhymes for me... and no it isn't mine


"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
 
Posts: 9421 | Location: EnglandReply With QuoteReport This Post
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I have a hard time making WILD and CHILD into one-syllable words! It spoils the rhythm.
 
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quote:
Originally posted by haberdasher:
I have a hard time making WILD and CHILD into one-syllable words! It spoils the rhythm.

Yes, that too. Ah, well... We ARE talking about a town where toilets are made. Roll Eyes

BTW, did anyone look up the Kohler company's history? It seems they produced cast iron bath tubs by porcelain coating livestock watering troughs!
 
Posts: 6168 | Location: Muncie, IndianaReply With QuoteReport This Post
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Let's not revert back to OEDILF. Remember, these are fun, and not perfect. And - just don't vote for them then. The rhyme worked fine for me, and I learned here (from Bob) about "wild" and "child." Remember our thread on "fire" as to whether it has one or two syllables? I finally agreed with Bob that it's one syllable, so that's how I see wild and child now. I wouldn't have before WC.

Geoff, to delete a vote, we have to delete everyone's votes. However, I'll just subtract one vote when reporting, and add it to another limerick. Which do you choose?

We need more votes, folks. Who hasn't voted?
 
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Funny that the one with the most votes (#11) has nothing to do with Kohler club or Kohler product!
 
Posts: 2605 | Location: As they say at 101.5FM: Not New York... Not Philadelphia... PROUD TO BE NEW JERSEY!Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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quote:
Originally posted by bethree5:
Funny that the one with the most votes (#11) has nothing to do with Kohler club or Kohler product!
But then I'm just being envious, cuz mine connected to the Club at least, & parsed well - but #11 was just funnier!
 
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Your limerick is pretty near perfect, but stupid Geoff didn't understand your meaning of "bipolar." Frown Damn.
 
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quote:
Originally posted by Geoff:
Your limerick is pretty near perfect, but stupid Geoff didn't understand your meaning of "bipolar." Frown Damn.


Not sure that I do.


"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
 
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Picture of Kalleh
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Geoff, do you want to vote for 8 instead of 11 then?

Bethree, when we started this game, many years ago, the limericks were supposed to be connected to the place. But over the years, that stopped. I still like to link them, but others often don't.

I'd love a few more votes, if possible. I'll post the results on Sunday.
 
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I think he wants ten instead of eleven (8 and 10 both use the bipolar rhyme)


"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
 
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What I want is for me to shut up! I think I'm a nut case. Is there a shrink in the house? Just forget I said anything and get on with the game.
 
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quote:
Originally posted by Geoff:
Your limerick is pretty near perfect, but stupid Geoff didn't understand your meaning of "bipolar." Frown Damn.
Hey that wasn't me. I'm #6, wearing spats & a bowler.
 
Posts: 2605 | Location: As they say at 101.5FM: Not New York... Not Philadelphia... PROUD TO BE NEW JERSEY!Reply With QuoteReport This Post
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Ah well, it was I. I was using bipolar as an analogy to our partisan political situation these days. Clearly didn't work. Frown

Here are the authors:

1) Sattva
2) Sattva
3) Sattva
4) Hab
5) Geoff
6) Bethree
7) Sattva
8) Bob
9) Geoff
10) Kalleh
11) Shu
12) Kalleh

Shu won again! (I am not going to let him enter a limerick next time. Mad I loved my #12 - I could just see that ball taking a U-turn and cracking off some guy's molar.)
 
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And I loved my take on bipolar and was surprised to get no votes. That's life.


"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
 
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