October 21, 2017, 06:20Geoff
The River Nene limericks
Here's what we've got:
“It’s ‘Nay-nay’,” you say? I say, “Nay! ‘Neen!’”
But a stranger chips in “While you may mean
The place, not the goose
(Which is what I deduce)
For most “Nin’s” the right way that they lean.
Inspired by the song, "Down by the Old Mill Stream".
Down by the River Nene
Where I first met Jean
With her eyes so blue
She was so untrue
Yes, Gene, but a queen.
You can rhyme it with hen or with bean.
It won’t trouble the old River Nene.
It flows on its way
Like a lazy spring day,
Not entirely, but mostly, serene.
Americans shout out Hey! Hey!
When our President lauds the KK.
He's rude to Ms. Cruz;
Is he missing some screws?
Let's push him in River Nene!
I was stopped by a cop by the Nene
In a park in the dark on the green
I was screwing a lass
With a mighty fine ass
How'd I know she was only sixteen?
This is a parody of the jazz standard, "Last time I saw Jeannine." Melody by Duke Peason, lyrics added later by Oscar Brown, Jr., sung by Eddie Jefferson.
Last time, last time I saw Jeannine
Was on, was on the River Nene
She left the ‘hood
She’s gone for good
She was, she was so awful mean
As I lay on the banks of the Nene
With the beautiful Bridget McSween
I uttered great sighs
As she stoked my thighs
And nestled herself in between
An old goat on a boat on the Nene
Whose language was bawdy and mean
Met a nun from a cloister
"I will give you my oyster,"
She said, "When your mouth has come clean"
Pick one. Oh, shucks, pick two - they're cheap!
October 21, 2017, 20:48sattva
Geoff, you didn't include my favorite that you wrote:
"While floating serene on the Nene
Someone said, "What on earth's a 'spalpeen?'"
I said, "I know not,
But I fear that it's got
A meaning that's likely obscene"
Can't we include this as "I", because this is the one I like best?!
October 22, 2017, 04:11Geoff
If you want to include it, OK.
October 23, 2017, 11:33Geoff
Since we've got a "jump ball" situation here, would someone who hasn't voted please pick one to give us a winner?
October 23, 2017, 11:40Geoff
Sunflower here: I like C.
October 23, 2017, 11:44Geoff
Huh? How'd my spouse log in as me??? Oh, well, we now have a winnah! Sattva, you're it!
I wrote H and I; Bob wrote A, Sattva wrote B and C, Kalleh wrote D, Tinman wrote E, F and G.
October 24, 2017, 21:10Kalleh
I am late to this party but would have picked A. I wanted one (besides mine) that had a proper rhyme. Speaking of proper rhymes, where is Greg these days?
October 25, 2017, 06:13Geoff
Shucks, Kalleh, A was my pick too. Bob, you got cheated!
I must ask whether you did or did not like the idea of using a geographical feature instead of a town?
October 25, 2017, 14:49sattva
No, he didn't. I abdicate to Bob.
October 26, 2017, 05:56BobHale
I'll post a new place tomorrow - as for geographical features - why not? I once did the moon and once did Narnia so I'm flexible on what constitutes a place name.