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Detective Descriptors

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August 10, 2004, 10:37
Robert Arvanitis
Detective Descriptors
After an excess of youthful television viewing a list arises spontaneously. Namely, detectives in film and broadcast, arranged by their salient features. Of course, these are idiosyncratic perceptions. I invite identification, improvements and additions:

Addict HOLMES
Alcoholic FURILLO
Bald KOJAK
Blind LONGSTREET
Cosmopolitan(s)
Disabled IRONSIDE
Esthete
Obese CANNON
Phobic
Psychic
Rigid
Sloppy COLUMBO
Unfashionable MANNIX

CHINESE SAMMO
ELDERLY BARNABY JONES
INEPT CLOUSEAU

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Robert Arvanitis,


RJA
August 10, 2004, 10:58
arnie
Elderly
Foreign (I could list their countries, such as China, France, etc.)


Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
August 10, 2004, 19:16
Hic et ubique
"I invite identification"

Having the gift of a poor memory of the hours I wasted in front of the vidiot box, I can only identify a few, and those but tentatively.

Bald: Kojak
Disabled: Ironside
Sloppy: Columbo
August 10, 2004, 19:39
Robert Arvanitis
Hic et ubique is right on the mark.

I in turn would hazard that Arnie's elderly detective was Barnaby Jones, played by Buddy Ebsen (or was it the reverse?)

Also recall a portly Chinese detective, Sammo Law, whose size made his martial acrobatics all the more impressive. Of course with that show, I spent more time watching Kelly Hu than him.


RJA
August 11, 2004, 01:37
aput
Blind: Longstreet. I can't remember anything about the show, but after Ironside it seemed they were making each one more unusual. That said, there were an awful lot of them round then and I can't recall any specific personal gimmicks for Mannix, Petrocelli, Banacek, or Rockford. Well, 'Armenian', 'doesn't like name mispronounced', etc.
August 11, 2004, 05:52
Robert Arvanitis
Updated list credits Hic and Arnie for their identifications and additions.

Arnie remembers even more names than I did. Based on loud sports coats, I had Mannix as "unfashionable."

New Hint -- Two adjacent names on the list are on TV this season, and have appeared together on a combined ad for their respective shows.


RJA
August 11, 2004, 08:17
arnie
quote:
Arnie remembers even more names than I did.
I think you mean aput here.

How about Inspector Clouseau (The Pink Panther) for the French detective? For an alcoholic there was Capt. Furillo in Hill Street Blues. The obese guy must be Frank Cannon.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: arnie,


Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.
August 11, 2004, 08:58
Robert Arvanitis
Thanks arnie. I meant to credit you for new descriptors, and aput for names.

List updated accordingly.

Next, I shall risk starting a philosophy war. I believe the French, derailed by Descartes, are dedicated to deduction, from initial axioms. Good for cafe' conversation, bad for police work. Thus Clouseau...

Give me the English empiricists any day.


RJA
August 11, 2004, 15:15
Cat
Is the addict Sherlock Holmes? I've heard (alhough the stories I've read have yet to mention it), that he was fond of coke.
August 11, 2004, 15:25
Robert Arvanitis
Kudos to kat!

(With apologies -- less of an orthographic wrench than 'Cudos to cat')

The list is updated accordingly.

But now -- who are the current, adjacent, and amusingly-advertising pair?


RJA
August 11, 2004, 15:50
Seanahan
Holmes is certainly the addict. Although whether it was cocaine or heroin I don't recall offhand. I remember a television show where he injected himself with a needle with some sort of drug.
August 11, 2004, 16:28
jheem
The Straight Dope on Holmes' cocaine usage. Short answer, canonic tale in which usage occurred: A Study in Scarlet.