When I was a child, at Christmas time (I was raised Christian, but converted to Judaism when I married) the very last--and by far the best--present our parents gave us was always called the "coup de grace". Because of that, I had always thought that phrase to mean "the best". Recently, I was about to write something using that term to mean "the best", but decided to look it up first. In fact, it means:
"the stroke of mercy with which an executioner ends by death the sufferings of the condemned; hence, a decisive, finishing stroke."

I suppose my parents meant "finishing stroke"? Has anyone used this phrase differntly? I am a bit stumped.

The final part of the definition, "a decisive, finishing stroke", is the sense in which your parents used the phrase. Slightly extended, it can also mean a finishing touch, the peak or nadir, or "the cherry on top of the cake".

Nowadays everyone buys their chicken packaged in the supermarket but back when families raised their own in the back yard, the necessary beheading of the animal was known as the "chicken coup de grace."

Really! Look it up in the next edition of the OED. That thing's gonna be loaded with puns!!

was that the chicken
that flew the coup?

((( There's gotta be a DD in there somewhere -- or at least a L )))

A chicken rancher named Lou
On beheading a rooster he knew
Let go of the bird
And a question he heard:
"Was that the one that flew the coup?"

Will this do ???

A doomed chicken destined for stew
Survived a heroic breakthrough
The old rancher, 'tis said,
Shouted, "Off with his head!"
The chicken withdrew from the coup.

[This message was edited by jerry thomas on Wed Mar 5th, 2003 at 15:20.]

Somehow, I knew this post would turn into one of 4 possibilities: puns, limericks, double dactyls or beer! Oh--a fifth: Sex!

On a more serious note, I was surprised by the number of military-related definitions. Arnie, did you find the "cherry on top of the cake" definition somewhere, or is that how you've heard the meaning extended?

"The cherry on the top of the cake" is a pretty common metaphor here for the finishing touch to something.

quote:

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Slightly extended, it can also mean a finishing touch, the peak or nadir, or "the cherry on top of the cake".

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Yes, arnie, we use that phrase as well here in the U.S. However, I wondered, by your "slightly extended" comment, if you meant that is how it is used--or if you had actually found it defined that way.

The definition of "a decisive, finishing stroke" is what is extended, metaphorically, to mean any finishing touch. Sorry if I was unclear.

Kalleh, I think other dictionaries are give more accurate definitions than AHD, the one your read.

coup de grâce
-Websters Unabridged: a decisive, finishing stroke (from the stroke of mercy with which an executioner ends by death the sufferings of the condemned)
-WordNet: the blow that kills (usually mercifully)
-Roget's (hardcover) gives such synonyms as "finisher, clincher, crusher, knockout blow, deathblow, finishing stroke"

In that Roget context "finishing stroke" obviously does not the sort of triumphal flourish on a cake." I would say that AHD's definition, is misleading: by saying finishing stroke" without that context, it suggests the "cherry on the cake" meaning your parents employed. I'd use 'finishing touch' for that cherry, but never 'coup de grâce'.

I'd think that another though perhaps imperfect phrase for that cherry might be pièce de résistance -- but the dictionaries do not support me on this. Comments from others?

The cherry would be 'the cherry on top of the cake'.

The act of adding the cherry might be considered a 'coup de grace'.

The whole thing - cake plus cherry - might make a piece de resistance.

Wouldn't it be dull if we asked somebody French what these phrases mean?

Yes, I agree, Graham because I don't think we are using it correctly.

Would my parents have called my most wonderful present--that doll dressed up in frills--to mean: "the stroke of mercy with which an executioner ends by death the sufferings of the condemned; hence, a decisive, finishing stroke."--which comes from dictionary.com? I think not, nor anything akin to that to that! (I hope!)

Here are definitions of "coup", as well as other "coup" words. Does anyone here know how this phrase is used in France?

"Coup \Coup\ (k??), n. [F., fr.L. colaphus a cuff, Gr. ????.] A sudden stroke; an unexpected device or stratagem; -- a term used in various ways to convey the idea of promptness and force.

Coup de main (k??` de m?n`) [F.] (Mil.), a sudden and unexpected movement or attack.

Coup de soleil (k??` d s?-l?l or -l?"y') [F.] (Med.), a sunstroke.

In addition Kalleh's words,

coup: a sudden stroke ... (conveys promptness and force). (AHD: a brilliantly executed stratagem; a triumph)
coup de grâce: A deathblow delivered to end the misery of a mortally wounded victim [etc.] [per AHD]
coup de main (Military): a sudden action undertaken to surprise an enemy
coup de soleil: sunstroke

AHD gives

coup d'état: the sudden overthrow of a government [etc.]
coup de théâtre: 1. a sudden dramatic turn of events in a play. 2. an unexpected and sensational event, especially one that reverses or negates a prevailing situation

The common thread seems to be adverse action against a victim.* To my mind, that's indeed the sense of the word "coup".
And if so, coup de grâce, literally 'mercy stroke', has an oxymoronic ring to it.

--------------------------------
*The exception being coup d'oeil:: a quick survey; a glance (literally, stroke of the eye)

One site, doubtless with tongue in cheek, gives coup de graisse: death by chocolate.

(You as I will doubtless be fascinated by that site's link to "20 reasons Chocolate is Better than Sex", and frustrated that the link doesn't work. Here is a replacement link. Go on; I know you can't resist ...)

[This message was edited by Hic et ubique on Fri Mar 14th, 2003 at 17:28.]

This is the best recipe you will ever find for "Death by Chocolate". It is by Mr. Food and "OOH, IT'S SO GOOD!"

Stupid me; I thought "coup de gras" meant "mow the lawn."