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Poetry in the Law

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November 11, 2021, 16:10
shufitz
Poetry in the Law
I found this on the web:
quote:
Smoke and sparks were a real danger on early railroads — in 1916 one Edson Hains filed a claim against the Wheeling & Lake Erie Railroad Company in Cuyahoga County, Ohio, for burning down his outhouse. The case is doubly memorable because Hains filed his pleading in verse:
    Now comes the plaintiff, Edson Hains, and prays this august Court
    To heed the very earnest plea, enshrined in this report.
    The Wheeling & Lake Erie Co., a heartless corporation,
    But licensed under certain laws of this fair State and Nation,
    Did, by a spark through carelessness, from a locomotive owned
    By the defendant in this Court, and by it not atoned,
    Destroy and render Null and Void, a building situate
    Upon the rear of premises, known as E. Hains Estate,
    Which in the town of Bedford lies, a placid rural spot,
    Until the conflagration, which spoiled the plaintiff’s lot.
    The second of November last was the most woeful date
    On which the said defendant did this outrage perpetrate.
    Said building being plain but good, and open to all callers,
    Was worth in money of the realm, the sum of fifty dollars.
    Now, the aforesaid Hains will not cite Blackstone, Coke or Livy,
    The incinerated building was, in vulgar terms, a privy.
    The wealthy have from two to eight, but this case is more sad,
    For like the poor man’s one ewe lamb, ’twas the only one he had.
    And now in frigid winter’s time, before beginning labor,
    He eke perforce must use the can of an obliging neighbor.

    The plaintiff does still further state that he is an inventor,
    And since the last catastrophe he has no place to center
    His great inventive genius which, before in chaste seclusion
    Of the before in mentioned can, did blossom in profusion.
    True genius cannot be appraised, but plaintiff’s was so nifty
    He thinks he should receive therefor at least one hundred fifty.
    He therefore prays the Court to grant two hundred Iron Men,
    That he may once more take his place midst Bedford’s upper ten,
    And walk abroad midst citizens, and meet them man to man,
    Which now he cannot rightly do, he being shy a can.
    And so he prays that he may go from hence with compensation,
    Commensurate with what he’s lost, through this his degradation.
    And so he windeth up his prayer, and hopes the Court will grant
    One fifty for his peace of mind, and fifty for the plant.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: shufitz,
November 11, 2021, 16:39
BobHale
Excellent. Do we know if his case was successful? And was the judgement also rendered in verse?


"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
November 12, 2021, 05:48
Geoff
I wonder what Mr Hains invented besides clever verse?
November 14, 2021, 15:34
tinman
quote:
Originally posted by BobHale:
Excellent. Do we know if his case was successful?

Hains won — Judge William H. McGannon assessed the railroad $25 and costs.
November 17, 2021, 10:05
bethree5
Big Grin Big Grin Big Grin !!!

Fine versing. Consistency of theme throughout - introduced in l.8 with "Upon the rear of premises."
November 22, 2021, 19:57
Kalleh
As Shu knows, I love it. He showed it to me, and I told him he had to put it on WC.