I think that's about all we're going to collect from KENT, so here they are:
A. I once saw the Dutchess of Kent Imbibing champagne in a tent She did cry a great sob Said “The duke is a slob And what's more, his old willie is bent!”
B. I once knew a bach’lor from Kent Whose dick oh so sadly was bent He hadn’t a lady Until he met Sadie Whose cooch crooked where his member went
C. There was a young lady of Kent Whose clothes were seductively rent When folks asked her how come She'd reply "For a sum I will show you your money's well spent"
D. "Repent, all ye sinners, repent!" Cried the preacher, one Sunday in Kent But he mumbled his vocals So none of the locals Had the faintest idea what he meant.
E. Said an innocent laddie from Kent, "Why's my semen so white when I've spent, But my urine so yellow?" "Of course, my dear fellow, To show if you've come or you went!"
F. I just met a fellow from Kent Who lives in a shabbby old tent I inquired as to why And he sighed, and said “I Can no longer afford to pay rent!"
G. I know a curmudgeon from Kent Who was, in years past, a nice gent Until he was taken For all of his bacon By Hilda, ex-wife from hell sent.
H. You'll find a fish market in Kent Which has an agreeable scent Between rows of fish You may sniff as you wish They've planted prodigously mint
I. A parfumier working in Kent In a lab that, alas, had no vent Had so little success That he dropped dead from stress In an ironic twist - "Heaven Scent". ____________________________
Four submitters, nine entries. Enjoy!
(PS. Tell me if I left anything/anyone out.)
(PPS. "Kennt" is German for "he knows".)
January 23, 2024, 02:42
BobHale
E
"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
January 23, 2024, 06:35
Geoff
Peyronie's prevails at the start But then comes a shrew and a tart And there's fish and perfume But no Pope, Locke, or Hume, But penises three played a part
Lots of good stuff here! I'm torn between agreeing with Bob and picking E or choosing B. I'll go with B in support of penile perfidy.
January 23, 2024, 11:28
haberdasher
Now that's a learnèd meta-limerick if ever I saw one !
I can't say anything; I'm only a tie-breaker...
January 23, 2024, 12:18
Geoff
Funny what pops into my battered old noggin at times! PS: E doesn't take into account retrograde ejaculation, wherein one can come and go simultaneously.
January 25, 2024, 18:20
Kalleh
Sorry I have been absent from these - and I love the limerick game. Nicely done - clearly many by men. I vote for A.
January 26, 2024, 01:25
BobHale
quote:
Originally posted by Kalleh: Sorry I have been absent from these - and I love the limerick game. Nicely done - clearly many by men. I vote for A.
Not sure A isn't libellous.
"No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson.
January 26, 2024, 14:17
Geoff
quote:
Originally posted by BobHale:
quote:
Originally posted by Kalleh: Sorry I have been absent from these - and I love the limerick game. Nicely done - clearly many by men. I vote for A.
Not sure A isn't libellous.
If they sue the writer can ask them to show proof.
January 29, 2024, 09:20
haberdasher
We've had a week to review them anonymously, so here they are with their perpetrators writers -
A. I once saw the Duchess of Kent Imbibing champagne in a tent She did cry a great sob Said “The duke is a slob What's more, his old willie is bent!” -Geoff
B. I once knew a bach’lor from Kent Whose dick oh so sadly was bent He hadn’t a lady Until he met Sadie Whose cooch crooked where his member went -bethree5
C. There was a young lady of Kent Whose clothes were seductively rent When folks asked her how come She'd reply "For a sum I will show you your money's well spent" -Geoff
D. "Repent, all ye sinners, repent!" Cried the preacher, one Sunday in Kent But he mumbled his vocals So none of the locals Had the faintest idea what he meant. -BobHale
E. Said an innocent laddie from Kent, "Why's my semen so white when I've spent, But my urine so yellow?" "Of course, my dear fellow, To show if you've come or you went." -hab
F. I just met a fellow from Kent Who lives in a shabbby old tent I inquired as to why And he sighed, and said “I Can no longer afford to pay rent!" -Geoff
G. I know a curmudgeon from Kent Who was, in years past, a nice gent Until he was taken For all of his bacon By Hilda, ex-wife from hell sent. -bethree5
H. You'll find a fish market in Kent Which has an agreeable scent Between rows of fish You may sniff as you wish They've planted prodigiously mint -Geoff
I. A parfumier working in Kent In a lab that, alas, had no vent Had so little success That he dropped dead from stress In an ironic twist - "Heaven Scent". -BobHale
Who'd'a thunk it!This message has been edited. Last edited by: haberdasher,
January 29, 2024, 10:35
Geoff
I thunk that E was either yours or B35's. I thunk right.
February 02, 2024, 22:09
haberdasher
I see one kudo for A, and one B, and one for E, and a couple of did-not-voters. Can we improve on that? So many noshows bodes poorly for November, y'know...
February 03, 2024, 06:30
Geoff
quote:
So many noshows bodes poorly for November, y'know...