The teacher claimed it was so plain,
I only had to use my brain
She said the past of throw was threw,
The past of grow – of course – was grew,
So flew must be the past of fly,
And now my boy, your turn to try.
But when I trew
I had no clue
If mow was mew
Like know and knew
(Or is it knowed
Like snow and snowed?)

The teacher frowned at me and said
The past of free was – plainly – fed.
Fed up, I knew then what I ned:
I took a break, and out I snoke,
She shook and quook (or quaked? or quoke?)
With raging anger out she broke:
Your ignorance you want to hide?
Tell me the past form of collide!
But how on earth should I decide
If it's collid
(Like hide and hid),
Or else – from all that I surmose
The past of rise was simply rose,
And that of ride was surely rode,
So of collide must be collode?

Oh damn these English verbs, I thought
The whole thing absolutely stought!
Of English I have had enough,
These verbs of yours are far too tough.
Bolt upright in my chair I sat,
And said to here 'that's that' – I quat.
- Guy Deutscher

Perhaps you should re-title this thread "Irregulari-tease"?

For more on Guy Deutscher, see here. (Google is a strange and wondrous thing!)