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Funny signs

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March 05, 2006, 20:37
Kalleh
Funny signs
I know we've had similar topics, but have any of you seen any funny signs lately? I saw one today in my grocery store that I had fun with. The following was referring to a meat slicer:

Never clean a slicer with it running. Cleaning a slicer with it "on" could lead to termination.

My first reaction was...now that's a bit dramatic. Then I realized what they meant. Wink
March 06, 2006, 06:44
<Asa Lovejoy>
This morning I read the label on a package of desicant in a pill bottle: "Harmless absorbent- do not eat." It it's harmless, why not eat it!?
March 06, 2006, 18:45
tinman
quote:
Originally posted by Kalleh:
Never clean a slicer with it running.

That reminds me of the guy who worked in the pickle factory and had sexual fantasies about the pickle slicer. He wanted to ... oh, never mind.

Tinman
March 06, 2006, 19:38
Kalleh
Funny, Tinman! Big Grin

Asa, I agree. I have seen patients, though, who take that desiccant, thinking it's part of their pills. Roll Eyes
March 06, 2006, 21:39
<Asa Lovejoy>
And then did they have to suddenly dessicate? Will Pepto Bismol help?
March 07, 2006, 10:45
dalehileman
I hope headlines qualify, as I was taken with the foowllowing list from WS

Ambiguous Newspaper Headlines

(These--cadged from another site--brought tears to my eyes, esp. when I imagined some of them in pictures!)


EYE DROPS OFF SHELF

PROSTITUTES APPEAL TO POPE

KIDS MAKE NUTRITIOUS SNACKS

STOLEN PAINTING FOUND BY TREE

LUNG CANCER IN WOMEN MUSHROOMS

QUEEN MARY HAVING BOTTOM SCRAPED

DEALERS WILL HEAR CAR TALK AT NOON

MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH

MILK DRINKERS ARE TURNING TO POWDER

DRUNK GETS NINE MONTHS IN VIOLIN CASE

JUVENILE COURT TO TRY SHOOTING DEFENDANT

COMPLAINTS ABOUT NBA REFEREES GROWING UGLY

PANDA MATING FAILS; VETERINARIAN TAKES OVER

POLICE BEGIN CAMPAIGN TO RUN DOWN JAYWALKERS

12 ON THEIR WAY TO CRUISE AMONG DEAD IN PLANE CRASH

KILLER SENTENCED TO DIE FOR SECOND TIME IN 10 YEARS

SAFETY EXPERTS SAY SCHOOL BUS PASSENGERS SHOULD BE BELTED

2 SISTERS REUNITED AFTER 18 YEARS AT CHECKOUT COUNTER

MAN EATING PIRANHA MISTAKENLY SOLD AS PET FISH

ASTRONAUT TAKES BLAME FOR GAS IN SPACECRAFT

QUARTER OF A MILLION CHINESE LIVE ON WATER

INCLUDE YOUR CHILDREN WHEN BAKING COOKIES

OLD SCHOOL PILLARS ARE REPLACED BY ALUMNI

GRANDMOTHER OF EIGHT MAKES HOLE IN ONE

HOSPITALS ARE SUED BY 7 FOOT DOCTORS

LAWMEN FROM MEXICO BARBECUE GUESTS

TWO SOVIET SHIPS COLLIDE, ONE DIES

ENRAGED COW INJURES FARMER WITH AX

LACK OF BRAINS HINDERS RESEARCH

RED TAPE HOLDS UP NEW BRIDGE

SQUAD HELPS DOG BITE VICTIM

IRAQI HEAD SEEKS ARMS

HERSHEY BARS PROTEST
March 07, 2006, 20:03
Kalleh
Hilarious!

I always like the medical ones, like "Hospital sued by 7 foot doctors" and "Eye drops off shelf." Big Grin I am a little worried about those female mushrooms though.
March 08, 2006, 09:30
Caterwauller
While driving through the neighborhood today, I spotted this on a church sign:

Plant your seed and your blessings will grow.

I almost had to pull over, I was laughing so hard.


*******
"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
~Dalai Lama