I'm not sure if anyones seen this, but I thought it funny enough to post anyway..

Here's a little something from the Washington Post Style Invitational contest that asks readers to submit "instructions" for something (anything), written in the style of a famous person . . the winning entry was:...

The Hokey Pokey, as written by W. Shakespeare...

"O proud left foot, that ventures quick within
Then soon upon a backward journey lithe.
Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:
Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.
Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke,
A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.
To spin! A wilde release from Heavens yoke.
Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl.
The Hoke, the poke -- banish now thy doubt
Verily, I say, 'tis what it's all about."

Oh, Jim, that is just great! Can anyone come up with some of your own?

BTW, welcome back, Jim!

Yes, truly excellent! This is exactly the sort of writing to which I aspire. (No comments, please, on rates of success.)

The magazine New York used to have (and may still continue, I don't know) competitions of this sort though theirs seemed to be somewhat briefer in form. One I recall challenged readers to write doggerel which included a play on words of the name of a famous person. One non-winner, which used the name of the not entirely famous actor William Windom, went:

Me brudder Bill's a wraslin' star.
Most other guys? He's pinned 'em.
You see dem trophies on de wall?
Me brudder William Windom.


Love it! Might it be possible to post links to both these contests on this site?


And lastly, dittoing Kalleh, welcome back, Jim!

In hospital fer Tourette Syndrome,
I be the head of narson.
We done all we could fer Johnny,
But we can't stop Johnny Carson.

The candidate for Governor
Stoned with eggs at kegger
Terminator mode kicks in
When Arnold swats an egger

TrossL, it is good to see your creative mind here again!