See any funny quotes? Let's hear them!

We have this little section in our newspaper called "Quotables." Usually I just read them and smile, but these two made me laugh:

A tweet from Jennifer Granholm, former Michigan governor, on former governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (he should have stayed in acting!):

"Another guy admits 2 cheating on his wife. Maybe we need more women governors. Guys: keep ur pants zipped for Pete's sake. #Arnold."

French lawyer Gerald Lefcourt, outraged that International Monetary Fund chief, Dominique Strauss-Kahn is being held in Rikers Island jail in NY on sexual assault charges:

"There are numerous very heavy barred doors that make a noise each time they are opened or closed...The food is terrible."

Duh! Does he realize it's jail??

Joan Rivers is supposed to have said, "Oprah thinks she's God. I saw her in Barnes and Noble signing copies of the bible."

Both Obama and Oprah are from Chicago. We're not all bad!

Chicago!?!?!? I thought O'Bama, the Irish President, was from Hawaii.

Just read this from Phyllis Diller: "You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot."

Or, "Your stockings are wrinkled" when you aren't wearing any.

A wonderful speaker today, who got an standing ovation, started, and ended, her talk with Robert Frost's superb poem:

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

She did it so effectively going verse by verse as she went through her talk, and then leaving the last verse for the end. Of course, it was very relevant to the subject being discussed.

I was in the library yesterday looking at a collected works of Robert Frost. It's about three inches thick and contains a lot of poems. I wonder why that, wonderful though it is, is the only one I ever hear quoted. My personal favourite is the rather more cynical

Some say the world will end in fire,
Some say in ice.
From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those who favor fire.
But if it had to perish twice,
I think I know enough of hate
To say that for destruction ice
Is also great
And would suffice

Yes, that one is fabulous, too. I imagine part of the reason we hear the one I cited is because it is easy to apply to aspirations.

quote:

Originally posted by Proofreader:

I found a sign that said "Dead End."

That's what it says on the back of my bicycle shorts.