October 18, 2010, 05:03
Greg SLimerick Game: Geelong Poll
The following are the Geelong limericks. Pick the one that most tickles your fancy and vote for it.<B>1</B><BR>The best tea is Lapsong Souchong<BR>But the way others drink it is wrong.<BR>I sip my drinkie<BR>With extended pinkie<BR>Just as they do down in Geelong.<BR><BR><B>2</B><BR>In Australia's a city, Geelong,<BR>Where my girlfriend just doesn't belong.<BR>She flaunts all her stuff<BR>And if that's not enough,<BR>She struts 'round the town in thee thong!<BR><BR><B>3</B><BR>A gigolo workin' Geelong<BR>Tells each client, "Babe, don't get me wrong.<BR>Though I ain't one to skite,<BR>You might get a fright<BR>When ya check out the size o' me schlong!"<BR><BR><B>4</B><BR>A harlot who worked in Geelong<BR>Told a fellow, "Now don't be too long.<BR>Although you've employed me<BR>And I'd sooner you enjoyed me<BR>I'm simply not feeling too strong."<BR><BR><B>5</B><BR>I'm planning a journey to Geelong<BR>To see if their football's as strong<BR>As Gregory swears<BR>(As good as our Bears?).<BR>If not...I'll be off to Hong Kong!<BR><BR><B>6</B><BR>Greg tried not to make his new plea long<BR>Send me more limerick's for "Geelong"'<BR>Well, I've nothing to say<BR>To excuse my delay<BR>But next time I'll try not to be long.<BR><BR><B>7</B><BR>When Hank took a hit in Geelong,<BR>The locals had doctored his bong,<BR>And to his surprise,<BR>While surfing the highs,<BR>A dolphin jumped out of his dong.<BR><BR><B>8</B><BR>There was a young boxer of Geelong<BR>Said, "I am, as I'm sure you'll agree, strong.<BR>In fact I'm the strongest!"<BR>Turned out he was wrongest<BR>His opponent was stronger. Way to be wrong.<BR><BR><B>9</B><BR>Said this diffident guy from Geelong<BR>To his new date, "I fear that my schlong<BR>Though quite full of rigour<BR>And blessed with fine vigour<BR>Is not, I confess, all that long".<BR><BR>It took a while but we finally got a few done. Thanks!123456789
October 18, 2010, 16:43
<Proofreader>Two weeks ago, while attempting to place what I believed to be a fairly docile cat in a carrier, I found a feral buzzsaw attached to my finger. Within twelve hours my hand was badly swollen and eventually became the size of a baseball glove -- a very painful glove, indeed. Apparenly some cat bites are just as dangerous as a snake bite. So I was in no mood to compose limss for this contest. However, now that my hand is almost back to normal, I offer this one as an added attraction to the game.
A young lad living down in Geelong
Was possessed of a very wee dong.
And what made him much madder
Was his oversized bladder
Made time that he spent to pee, long.
October 18, 2010, 17:55
Greg SIt would have received my vote.
October 18, 2010, 19:56
KallehThanks, Greg. There are a number of good ones.
October 20, 2010, 22:17
Greg SI need at least one more vote to split the tie.
October 20, 2010, 22:53
BobHaleI voted. It hasn't helped.

October 20, 2010, 23:42
Greg SWell at least you've stayed with the strength, where the winning theme is clearly the male member whether referred to as a dong or a schlong.
October 23, 2010, 20:49
KallehGreg, you can break to the tie.
October 30, 2010, 01:35
Greg SHi Everyone,
Sorry it has taken me so long to get this completed, I have had a busy week, with my son over from Japan to receive his Masters in Linguistics. I had assumed that I would be casting a tie-breaking vote for Richard's schlong limerick (No. 9), but since I last looked someone else has voted for my schlong limerick (No. 3) so I guess that makes me the winner. Entries came from:
1 - Arnie
2 - Kalleh
3 - Me
4 - Richard
5 - Kalleh
6 - Bob
7 - Mike
8 - Bob
9 - Richard
Personally I really liked Richard's schlong and Mike's dolphin dong limericks. Of the others my favourite was Kalleh's thong limerick but I would have liked it a whole lot better if she'd used the lazy pronunciation of Geelong and finished with "a thong", rather than "thee thong". For the record in Australia thongs are what most of the rest of the world calls "flip-flops", but in the singular form we still recognise it as an undergarment.
I will post a new game shortly.
October 30, 2010, 02:30
Greg SThe new game for the town of Penola has been posted.
October 30, 2010, 17:05
KallehCongrats, Greg! Nice game, though I hope the new one is a teeny bit easier.