Here are the entries for Limerick Game: Pawtucket. Please choose the one you like best and enter your choice accordingly. Anyone can vote, including those who did not submit an entry. The winning entry will receive a bottle of Sarah Palin's latest scent: "Aerated Moose Urine."

Limerick A

A wobbly old man from Pawtucket,
While gathering eels in a bucket,
Slipped, and he fell,
(This didn’t go well)
His head in his bucket he stuckit.

Limerick B

A lady named Nan from Pawtucket
Would do nasty things for a ducat.
She would show me her muff,
But that wasn’t enough,
So I asked her, may I, Nan, tuck it?

Limerick C

All the oldies love corn in Pawtucket -
They gnaw on it raw as they shuck it,
And think that it’s yummy
When, toothless and gummy,
They’re given a corn cob to suck it.

Limerick D

There once was a man from Pawtucket
Whose tears we collect in a bucket
When lims he submits
Are not winning hits,
He says...[Oh that rhyme - I’d best duck it!]

Limerick E

There’s an obvious rhyme but I’ll duck it,
When writing my limerick for Pawtucket.
So now with my charter
To do something smarter -
I’ve got it, nah lost it, ahh fuck it!

Limrick F

In a seafood cafe in Pawtucket
A woman was calm till she struck it -
One oyster was closed
So she sternly proposed
That the waiter should flamin’-well shuck it!

Limerick G

A hooker who hailed from Pawtucket
Would carry her cash in a bucket.
”But won’t it get lost?”
They asked, “And the cost!”
”No problem”, she said, “I’ll just truck it”.

Question:
Which lim do you think the best?

Choices:
Limerick A
Limerick B
Limerick C
Limerick D
Limerick E
Limerick F
Limerick G

 

A woman who lived in Pawtucket
Proposed to her beau that he suck it.
"No, that can't be done, dearie.
It's really too hairy.
I will suck it as soon as you pluck it."

And that obscene deal? They struck it.

If that one was in the Poll I would have been very tempted to vote for it except for the Lines 3 & 4 rhyme. May I suggest:

"No, I'll ignore that pursuit
It's far too hirsute,
But I'll s.....

On the other hand she could simply have been Mary.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Greg S,

Hairy stuff on your muff
Is too tough and too rough

There once was a fellow named Huey Luck,
Requested a woman her clam to pluck.
She said with a smile,
My clam I'd defile,
If i made it as bald as your geoduck.

Hmmmm... You suppose Gilbert and Sullivan coulda used this?

http://www.kith-kin.co.uk/tag/?fish

Geoduck is pronounded "gooeyduck"

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Geoff,

I voted for "C," but it shows no votes in the poll. What happened?

Geoff the confused

Look again Geoff. Votes so far:

A-0, B-1, C-1, D-0, E-2, F-3 & G-0

Your vote has been counted properly. We have discussed the confusing nature of the software's method of displaying Poll results previously. On a suggestion from Richard last time I did the Poll, I placed the limericks' alphabetic Labels under the limericks, so it would be similar to the results display but nobody commented whether or not this made the results easier to follow.

It's unfortunate the software doesn't put everything on one line instead of two, but that's not my fault.

Here are the authors:

Geoff -- A & B
Stella -- C
Kalleh -- D
Greg S -- E & F
Richard English -- G

Looks like Greg wins again!

There's really only one thing I can say - Oh SHUCKS!

Perhaps I should do as you did Proof and stay out of the next one. I will come up with a new town shortly. I have one in mind but it is 3 syllables and they tend to be frowned on somewhat due to the difficulty. The town I have in mind is en route from Melbourne to Sydney and a popular stopover for those that find it difficult to make the entire trip in a single day. Considering its remoteness it is strangely commonly named in several of the most popular traditional Aussie folk songs. What do you guys reckon go for it or pick an easier 1 or 2 syllable town?

Welllll, fooey! I can't even figure out how to select the right spot to click in a poll!

I had hoped that people would note that "tuck" in my limerick means "place into a snug spot," but Greg's more overt rendering won the hearts, minds, and nether regions of the majority! Well done, Greg!

I voted F and might have been tempted by E except I couldn’t quite get L2 to scan. Either way - well done, Greg!

As usual, I liked all the limericks and ended up having to eliminate them for the niggliest things to find a winner.

Since nobody has replied objecting to me choosing a 3-syllable town, I'm inclined to go with it.

I have written 2 limericks already for this town. Should I include them in the Poll, or just put them in my intro on the town for you to read but not to vote for. Alternatively I could put them in the Poll but label them as mine, so if you really don't want me winning again you can deliberately choose not to vote for one of mine, but if you think mine is the best you still can if you want to?

I voted for your first one, Geoff. I thought it was great!

Greg, your line about "duck it" is identical to a line in a limerick of mine on OEDILF.

quote:

Originally posted by Greg S:
I have written 2 limericks already for this town. Should I include them in the Poll, or just put them in my intro on the town for you to read but not to vote for. Alternatively I could put them in the Poll but label them as mine, so if you really don't want me winning again you can deliberately choose not to vote for one of mine, but if you think mine is the best you still can if you want to?

Reminds me of the rules for Whackbat (The Fantastic Mr Fox)

Basically, there's three grabbers, three taggers, five twig runners, and a player at Whackbat. Center tagger lights a pine cone and chucks it over the basket and the whack-batter tries to hit the cedar stick off the cross rock. Then the twig runners dash back and forth until the pine cone burns out and the umpire calls hotbox. Finally, you count up however many score-downs it adds up to and divide that by nine.

The new game (Gundagai) has been started in a new thread.

Whackbat sounds like a great game!

I see nobody fancied my Pawtucket hooker - ah well...