Anyone else know of a Jerry Lewis routine, from a movie I suspect I never saw...it goes something like this:

"One hen
Two ducks
Three cackling geese
Four corpulent porpoises
Five Limerick oysters
Six pairs of Don Alfredo's spectacles
Seven brass monkeys from the secret, sacred crypts of Egypt
Eight hundred Macedonian warriors [arrayed?] in full battle regalia
Nine [edit]apathetic, sympathetic, diabetic old men with canes
Ten pink-and-purple penguins pushing pink-and-purple perambulators through [?past?] Prospect Park"

Name of movie? Corrections, as picky as you can accurately be? Context of monologue? Nine whats?[edit: I remembered.]

This message has been edited. Last edited by: haberdasher,

A Google search brings up several different versions.

[Thanks, arnie![/b]

quote:

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Originally posted by arnie:
A google search brings up several different versions.

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...of which this one seems to be the closest to what I was asking for. Interesting that you found it looking for "four corpulent porpoises;" I had tried with "one hen, two ducks" and even "(one hen, two ducks) and (Jerry Lewis)" and didn't find any of them. At least not on the first screen. How spoiled !

hab,

"four corpulent porpoises" is a combination of words that is unlikely to appear other than in the routine you are searching for, whereas "one hen, two ducks" and so on could, as you found, appear in text that has no connection with the target.

I learned this as a drinking game in the 50's, but cannot remeber all of them either. My recollection is a little different in ome caes.

"...Four porculent porpoises...
Six pair of Donald Frito's (sic) favorite tweezers,
Seven hundred Macedonian warriors in full battle array,
Eight brass monkeys,...

Nine I can't recall, but not diabetic men with canes..

Ten pregnant penguins pushing pneumatic perambulators through Palisades Park,..."


My recollection is that there were twelve verses, butnthis is as far as my aging memory takes me. Frankly, as a drinking game we rarely gotto eleven and twelve.

Welcome aboard, Paul Millius.


The original set of sentences is:
• One Fat Hen
• A Couple of Ducks
• Three Brown Bears
• Four Horny Hares
• Five Fat Fickle Females fixin' for a fight
• Six Simple Simons sitting on a stump
• Seven Sicilian Sailors sailing the Seven Seas
• Eight Egotistical Egotists, echoing egotistical ecstasies
• Nine Nude Nymps, nibbling gnat tales and nicotine
• Ten - I'm not the fig plucker, nor the fig plucker's son, but I'll pluck the figs 'till the fig plucker comes.

Hi. My mom taught this to me as a kid. She's gone now... and it seems so important that I figure it out.
Here's what I remember:
One hen
Two ducks
Three cackling geese
Four corpulent porpoises
Five Limerick oysters
Six pairs of Don Alverdo's favorite tweezers
Seven brass monkeys from the secret, sacred crypts of Egypt
Eight hundred Macedonian warriors marching to battle in full battle array
Nine apathetic, sympathetic, diabetic old men on roller scates
Any of this ringin any bells for anyone?? That's all I can remember.

Welcome to Wordcraft, Val.

Wordmatic

I remember ten very differently:
Ten tents on the tipmost, topmost, utmost, foremost tip of the river Thames attended by ten attentive attendants.

Welcome, macitark!

Interesting how this topic has brought in three new posters. Do break the trend, however, and stick around and post some more!

I see that Google search I made in May 2004 brings Wordcraft up as number 2 on the list (at least with my settings).

And I've got something slightly different again from 50 years ago!
Of course I can't remember it now, I shall have to go fossick through the paper jungle and find it.
But it was definitely:
One Duck
Two Chickens
Three squawking geese

I remember the squawking geese in particular because it came from a Canadian friend and her accent made the word "squarking"

BRB !

Edit: Cant find it yet
But altered what I do remember to the correct remember!

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Lily,

quote:

fossick

First Stella gives us "chuff" and now this. I assume it means "search"?

Yes, "search" or "rummage". Gold prospectors went fossicking. The Free Dictionary says it's Australian and NZ, but it's used in the UK as well.

I first heard this on the Johnny Carson show in the late 1960's. Jerry Lewis was the guest who came up with the One Hen, etc. Here is what I recall from that evening. I only remember eight of the ten. Here goes.....
One hen,
two ducks,
three squawking geese,
four coupulent porpoises,
five pairs of Don Elverso's tweesers,
six brass monkeys from the ancinet crypts of Egypt,
seven thousand Macedonians in full battle array,
eight old men on roller skates with a profane proclivity towards envy and sloth.

quote:

Ten - I'm not the fig plucker, nor the fig plucker's son, but I'll pluck the figs 'till the fig plucker comes.

As I recall it, in my youth it was the pheasant plucker. Not surprising, really, pheasants being more indigineous to the UK than figs.

Hello, Dwik. Welcome aboard. You've quoted a previous comment. Did you have a commentary of your own about it?

I learned this as

One duck;
Two laying hens;
Three squawking geese;
Four corpulent porpoises;
Five Limerick oysters;
Six pairs of Don L. Vazer's tweezers;
Seven thousand Macedonian soldiers marching in full array;
Eight ancient monkeys from the secret, sacred crypts of Egypt;
Nine sympathetic diabetic dirty old men on crutches;
Ten tin cans of the stringiest God-damned green beans in the whole wide world, from the Jolly Green Giant's outdoor backyard underground barbecue cupboard.

The variations and elaborations among these renditions are interesting. Some are clearly due to mishearing along the line; some due to transpositions. I have no idea where the last line of this version came from. It does offer the announcer-testing potential of "ten" and "tin" said in succession.

This is how I remember it!!


One hen
A couple of ducks
Three brown bears
Four running hares
Five corpulent corpuscles
Six slimy salamanders
Seven siamese sailors sailing the seven seas
Eight apathetic, sympathetic, diabetic old men on roller skates with a marked propensity towards procrastination and sloth.
Nine lyrical, spherical diabolical denizens of the deep who haul and stall around the quo, the quay and the quarry all at the same time.
Ten tufted tarantulas who tip-toe through the tulips.
Eleven elite elves elegantly eloping in november.
Twelve.......oh no, I FORGOT!!!!!!

Tom Evrard

This purports to be the original, from the horse's mouth as it were. What we each remember has undoubtedly undergone transformation from time and retelling and memory modification. Probably Jerry Lewis told different versions himself at different times!

Absolutely
My memory of this came from Summers on the lifeguard stand with some pseudo-english scholars. We had some rainy days without card games!
I'm sure the verses have been creatively altered.
I don't think there was a "Twelve".
Does anyone want to add????

Tom Evrard

Here's the answer folks:

The Announcer's Test
One hen
Two ducks
Three squawking geese
Four limerick oysters
Five corpulent porpoises
Six pair of Don Alversos tweezers
Seven thousand Macedonians in full battle array
Eight brass monkeys from the ancient sacred crypts of Egypt
Nine apathetic, sympathetic, diabetic, old men on roller skates with a marked propensity towards procrastination and sloth
Ten lyrical, spherical diabolical denizens of the deep who hall stall around the corner of the quo of the quay of the quivery, all at the same time.
This is called the announcer's test. It originated at Radio Central New York in the early 1940's as a cold reading test given to prospective radio talent to demonstrate their speaking ability.

Del Moore, a long time friend of Jerry's, took this test at Radio Central New York in 1941, and passed it on to him. (Del Moore is best remembered as Dr. Warfield in "The Nutty Professor," 1963)

Jerry has performed this test on radio, television and stage for many years, and it has become a favorite tongue twister of his fans around the world.

How wonderful! The last posting is exactly as I remembered it, apart from the few words at the end I could never catch when it was played in a musical version on a radio programme I used to listen to as a teenager.

Thank goodness I found this site! I too have been trying to verify the one hen, two ducks game. A friend who was in medical school taught it to me in the early '80's. It looks like there were a lot of versions but this is how mine went:
one hen
two ducks
three squaking geese.
four limeric oysters.
five corpulent porpoises.
six pair of Don Alvarezo's tweezers.
seven brass monkeys from the ancient sacred crypts of egypt.
eight hundred macedonian warriors dressed in full battle array.
nine apathetic sympathetic diabetic old men on roller skates with a marked propensity towards procrastination and sloth.
ten lyrical spherical diabolical denizens of the deep who haul stall around the quo of the quay of the quivey in simultaneous succession.

I find it amazing that my brain remembers that long nonsensical game but then struggles to come up with what I had for dinner last night!

Wow, look at all these new people! Welcome...and you might want to look around a bit. We're a fun group!