New York City

June 19, 2014, 20:28

bethree5

New York City

1.To find some rhymes for New York City Try itty-bitty shitty kitty, Then you must make it scan, Well done if you can - Let's hope at least it's pretty witty. 2.There was an old man from New York City (A town, I am told, without pity). Though he loved it so, It's said he don't know Shinola from [add rhyme that’s witty]. 3.There once was one W. Mitty, Who dreamed of a dark New York City— Armed thugs ‘round his condo? Dispatched with Tai Kwando! While girls hung on him, each one pretty. 4.There's a man who's in New York (the City) Considered (by him) a great wit. He, While hung like a horse, Was not virile, of course, Thus his repartee's wasted -- a pity. 5. A poem about New York City Can surely be nothing but witty. But it’s difficult choosing A rhyme so amusing – Perhaps I should form a committee. 6. A lim for the city, New York Is like birthing a baby (no stork!). The problem's the "city;" The meter's not pretty. So this one I cannot uncork. 7. On a business trip to New York City I wandered down to Jersey for some "kitty." T'was a very brief romance: Stole my wallet, shirt, and pants My colleagues laughed; there's no nude dork pity! 8. I sailed off to far New York City And in spite of disaster stayed witty, “When I said that I think I'd like ice in my drink I only wanted a much smaller bitty." 9. A gourmet from fair New York City Fancied himself fairly witty "Big Apple? No, durian" Said this fine epicurean, "Tastes good, but it smells rather shitty." <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Durian" target="_blank">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Durian</a>Please vote for the best limerickonetwothreefourfivesixseveneightnine

June 20, 2014, 21:38

Kalleh

None worked for me, so I did the best I could. This one was hard!

June 20, 2014, 23:40

BobHale

quote:
Originally posted by Kalleh:
None worked for me, so I did the best I could. This one was hard!

Because of your insistence on the weird non-standard new YORK CIty with it's very unusual consecutive stressed syllables. I've never heard anything but "new york CIty" with just the one stressed syllable. I've tried saying it out loud you way and can't even do it.

I found it very easy and both of my entries scan well (given the more usual pronunciation), though in hindsight I would have deleted one word.

June 21, 2014, 02:30

Stanley

Just discovered that we do it by poll now!

Votey-votey.

June 22, 2014, 11:47

<Proofreader>

I think we have a winner.

June 22, 2014, 20:46

Kalleh

quote:
Because of your insistence on the weird non-standard new YORK CIty with it's very unusual consecutive stressed syllables. I've never heard anything but "new york CIty" with just the one stressed syllable. I've tried saying it out loud you way and can't even do it.

It's the way we all say it where I'm from, Bob - similar to your putting an "er" on the end of "idea." Remember, those of you in England and in the East say the "or" in New York much differently than those of us in the rest of the U.S. I assume that's why - the "or" just is a natural stress; there's nothing to be done about it (for me). And, also for me, meter is an important part of a limerick. Clearly, it isn't for everyone here, which is fine. We all have our preferences.

Having said that, I voted for one, even though it didn't quite work for me.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Kalleh,

June 23, 2014, 19:20

Tom

Maybe she should have done New Amsterdam?

June 23, 2014, 19:29

bethree5

OK, time to call it-- we have 8 votes for 9 lims written by 7 limmers.

Clear winner is Bob Hale's #9.

Here's the line-up:
1. Greg's valiant rhymes perhaps lacked meter - no vote.
2. bethree's tired Shinola interested no one...
3. but her Bond-like Mitty got one taker.
4. proof's well-hung NY'r placed 2nd w/ 2 votes
5. Stanley's nicely-metered wry bit garnered a vote.
6. kalleh gets MVP for clever but no 'city', no votes
7. Geoff's hobbled meter painted a funny pic but alas no vote
8. bob hale has charisma: even this not-quite-perfect-scan garnered a vote, and...
9. his 2nd assay has it all: perfect meter; clever & unusual rhyming overrode the lack of bawd & tenuous connection to topic city. Do you eat this stuff in far Cathay, O Bob?

June 23, 2014, 21:08

Greg S

Of course mine lacked meter, that was the whole point of lines 3 & 4. I couldn't make anything scan at all, so I decided to have a bit of fun with it anyway. I would have been disappointed if anybody had voted for it.

And thanks B35 for making the effort to write a little bit of commentary on each one.

June 24, 2014, 21:10

Kalleh

Yes, I always like the commentary, too. I pored over these so intently when I made my choice that I don't remember now which one I selected!

June 25, 2014, 19:54

BobHale

While it's gratifying to win, I'm going to have to hand this over to someone else for the next place. In just over a week I'm moving to a new city and there is a good chance that I'll be without internet for about two months!

June 25, 2014, 20:36

Kalleh

Hey, Stanley, how would you like to come up with a venue? If you need help in developing the poll, I'm happy to talk you through it.

BTW, I have been convinced by Shu that you are all correct about the stresses in NY City. He did agree with me that, at least where we live, we say it as new YORK CI-ty. However, he also said that in a limerick it's easy to change the YORK slightly and make it work. He then recited a limerick and I see his point.