Skookumchuck is the name of a river in Washington and a town in British Columbia. See the Wikipedia article for other uses. This is the way I pronounce it, though with a little more energy. It rhymes with luck, duck, muck, and I’m sure you can think of a few more. You can see from this site that there is variation in the way people pronounce it, and my pronunciation is probably closest to the 9th "English (USA) Pronunciation." The 8th sounds almost the same, but noticeably different. Did that make sense? Anyway, send me your limericks via PM and I'll post them in about 2 weeks. Write as many as you want, and send me your best 3.

The way that's pronounced (with first syllable stress) would mean it rhymed with "DO come chuck" or "MOO come chuck" or, if adopting a slightly looser definition of rhyme, with "WOO dumb luck".

Guess you'll have to accept third syllable stress.

As for that site it's just indicating what the standard pronunciation MIGHT BE if it was in that language. I put in my home town and got a list of twenty or so, only one of which was even close to how it's actually pronounced. So it's probably not a good source to rely on.

Not my entry but the only way to construct a properl rhyming limerick here would be like this...

There once was a fellow of Skookumchuck
Who said my town rhymes well with "DO come chuck"
And though it isn't quite right
In a pinch one just might
Suggest that it could rhyme with "YOU dumb duck".

The issue is that the word is dactylic not anapestic.

I'll give it a shot though.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: BobHale,

I'll get you one, Tinman, but it seems hard.

Sent one

Got it. I now have a grand total of 1. Any one else?

yes but it is a very good one

Tinman, it is a hard one! Writing mine now, but prepared to not be impressed.

Yep Bob's first reply said it all, in summary it's not anapestic. That means there's no way I can read it or say it, and make it scan.

I have a had a few ideas of course, and Kalleh thinks I only ever think about the rhymes, but I actually care about the rhythm even more, and if I can't read it back to myself and make it sound like a limerick, then to my ears it's not a limerick.

So I think I am going to pass on this one.

Am I still the only entrant?
Do I get an automatic win?

This is more difficult than I thought it would be. I haven't been able to write one yet. I can get the first 2 lines, then go blank. However 3 more people have been able to write one, so I now have 4 entries. Put on your thinking caps and send me more limericks. One person submitted a limerick, then suggested it was too vulgar to publish. Nothing is too vulgar in a limerick. In fact, some way the true limerick must be vulgar and obscene.

Damn. There goes my certain victory.

Not necessarily, Bob. He didn't say they were good limericks

quote:

I have a had a few ideas of course, and Kalleh thinks I only ever think about the rhymes,

Awww - sorry about that, Greg. Send us one! I'd love to see an Aussie's perspective of the rhyme on this one. I like good rhymes, too, Greg, though in hard ones I will give a little. I come down hard on the meter - can't stand meter being off.

Bob, I had sent one in, though, as I indicated above, do not prepare to be impressed.

I did. Not much chop though. I wouldn't vote for it. But I am sure you will be able to pick which one it is.

I sent one in, too, after telling two people I didn't think I would. When I first saw the word I couldn't even fathom trying to do a limerick with it, and didn't revisit it until recently. I am thinking this might be the contest where we could choose the worse one as the winner. Just kidding! I am sure you all did better with it than you think. Can't wait to see what people did with this word!

quote:

Originally posted by sattva:
I am sure you all did better with it than you think. Can't wait to see what people did with this word!

Wow. I already think mine is brilliant. How good must it really be?

quote:

Originally posted by BobHale:

quote:

Originally posted by sattva:
I am sure you all did better with it than you think. Can't wait to see what people did with this word!

Wow. I already think mine is brilliant. How good must it really be?

I am sure you do think it's brilliant.

I've got 7 so far. People have handled this different ways. Some have rhymed Skookumchuck with the last syllable, chuck (which is what I envisioned). Some have chosen to rhyme with the first syllable skoo, and some have chosen to rhyme with all three syllables. Interesting. But you've all submitted only 1. You've got 2 more to go. And the rest of you have 3. So come on. Choose whichever rhyme scheme you please and send them to me. I've managed to crank out a few, most not very good. But one thing I've learned is that the ones I write which I think are kind of lousy, other people like. And the ones I write I think are pretty good often don't even get a sniff. So send me your limericks and let others be the judge of whether they're good or not.

I cannot wait to read these. I bet there are some creative ones.

Sent another

I sent another one, also. I am not planning to do a third one. Sorry.

I knew you could do it, Sattva. Anyone else?

I now have 8 entries. Keep 'em coming!

Yesterday I said I had 7 entries. Then I got 2 more from Bob and Sattva, so I should have 9. But I only see 8. So I either miscounted or I lost one. So when I post them, probably Tuesday, if I don't include yours, let me know.

Well, I definitely sent.. One. Am mulling over a second.
BTW I became completely enamored of this locale-- & also the area where Skookumchuck Narrows can be found (close to Vancouver). Have been looking up close via sattellite & online photos & road maps... may have to put Skookumchucks on my bucket list!

I'm looking forward for another one (or two) from you.

B3 sent in 2 more. Any more?

Hi tinman,
Are you putting this in poll format or should we vote as it is?
sattva

Given the slowness of sending, you got quite a few. We can just count down from the top and select a #.

I think it would be better in poll format if we can change it. Or at the very least add numbers. And then someone will need to tally up the votes.

If you read Tinman's message properly you would realise that he said, he would publish a poll, he just put this lot up, so that if there was a missed limerick we could let him know before he published the Poll.

Indeed he did. Mea culpa. For what it's worth both of mine are there.

The polls are nice, but not essential. You could just number them, Tinman, and then we could pick.

I always liked what CW used to call you, Tinny.

Okay, I can't figure out this damn poll, so I'm just going to number and post them. If someone else wants to put them in a proper poll format, be my guest. I've got a total of 15 and I hope I haven't left any out.


1
There’s a couple living in Skookumchuck
And the husband looks and acts like a duck
Though he quacks all the day
His wife thinks it’s okay
As she pecks the ground, and then makes a cluck

2
I was courted by a fella up near Skookumchuck
He thought chocolates and some flowers might just bring him luck
This guy thought me quite a femme
But I'm into S&M
So I stomped him with my high-heeled pump, the poor dumb fuck!

3
“I once saw an an old kangaroo come, Chuck”
Said a wife to her hubby in Skookumchuck
She went on in annoyance,
“You could use more flamboyance
It had rather more bounce than when you come, Chuck”

4
I once met a fella in Skookumchuck,
He was handsome and strong, and a true young buck.
While plenty of zen,
He wasn't a ten:
He'd make me so mad I'd yell, "You dumb schumuck!"

5
I got stuck in the muck in Skookumchuck
While driving around in my pickup truck
I almost cried
When the engine died
For I was out of gas and out of luck

6
A Haida living in Skookumchuck
Said, “Salish woman will bringmeluck”
He saw one out clamming
He thought it not damning
To offer his big, slimy geoduck

Geoduck is a large clam that has a very long, phallic-looking neck and is pronounced “gooey duck.” Here's a photo.

7
It wasn't Greece, but Skookumchuck
That sprite fellow no goo’ bum Puck
He, with potions, does wrong
So, the queen starts to long
For ass, ---Bottom, to woo ‘un f*ck

8
There was a man from Skookumchuck
Renowned for bravery and pluck
He feared no one
Under the sun
Except his wife, a French Canuck

9
When watching the tennis in Skookumchuck
The women make me wanna puke 'n' chuck.
Their play still appeals -
It's those horrible squeals
That make me and even John Newcombe chuck.

10
Had a blowout-- badly-timed--in my pick-up truck
I went off 95 up near Skookumchuck
I was nearly washed away
In the rapid Kootenay--
Saved by rafters-- totaled truck-- what a clusterfuck!

(May be sung to the tune of "While Strolling Through the Park One Day")

11
I said to the children, "Well do come chuck
Some wood on the bonfire", in Skookumchuk
They responded with glee
But for Charlie, and he
Just sulked when we said, "Why don’t you come, Chuck"?

12
He was lost and searching for Skookumchuck
Thought he’d ask some dudes in a pickup truck
“At the fork in the road,
Which way should I go?”
Looking mean, one replied, “I don’t give a f*ck!”

13
I went to a bar in Skookumchuck
Started a fight with a man named Buck
Got knocked to the floor
And kicked out the door
And landed in the filth and the muck

14
Whichever way you wanna spruik 'em Chuck,
I tell ya these people from Skookumchuck
Hate strangers and so
If you really must go,
Whatever you do, do not spook 'em, Chuck.

15
I was tryin' to find the little town o' Skookumchuck
At Vancouver, headed north through all the mire and muck
At the rapids near the narrows
Told to go east with the sparrows
So I drove 600 miles from West to East Bumfuck

This message has been edited. Last edited by: tinman,