Researchers at the University of Edinburgh have conducted a study on 127 women, exploring pickup lines. The results aren't too shocking:

~ Extroverted women like funny opening lines.
~ Non-conformists resisted displays of wealth and appeals to their sense of culture.
~ Chivalry appealed widely (when sutiors chided drunken louts, they were popular!)
~ Canned remarks did poorly.
~ Remarks on specific situations did well.
~ Offering thoughts on paintings at a museum did well (That, along with thoughts on good poetry, wouldn't do well on Wordcraft, however!).
~ Generally the 60 males interviewed did okay with predicting successful remarks, though they overestimated the effectiveness of risque lines (Why am I not surprised?).

Thoughts? Men, what has worked for you? Women, what lines do you prefer?

I suppose it depends to some extent on the reason for the pick-up. Chivalry appeals widely to women who are seeking a partner or provider; my experience is that it works far less well if they are simply seeking a brief sexual liaison.

As we used to say when I was at school, and began to take an interest in those strange beings who couldn't even throw a cricket ball, "Nice guys are always losers".

By which was meant they lost out in the game of sexual conquest. Of course, women liked them and talked about them as "generous", "reliable", "trustworthy", "OK to take home to meet the family" - but those were the chaps who remained virgins.

The successful chaps were those who were cheeky (and especially if their cheek made girls laugh), didn't offer to buy them things, didn't promise undying love - they rarely left a pick-up venue alone.

Sadly, I was one of the former and it took me a long time to realise that the old saying was just soooo right! Now, as a happily-married man of long standing (43 years next week) the knowledge has come rather too late ;(

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Sadly, I was one of the former and it took me a long time to realise that the old saying was just soooo right! Now, as a happily-married man of long standing (43 years next week) the knowledge has come rather too late ;(

Ah, but that rather begs the question--had you been one of the other type of bloke, would you have managed to find the right kind of girl that you could stay married to (and would put up with you) for 42 years?

Possibly not - but that wasn't my intention 43 years ago. Someone who would stay with me for 43 minutes in an appropriate position would have done just fine

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Someone who would stay with me for 43 minutes in an appropriate position would have done just fine

Can we assume that your successful pickup line did not run along those lines?

David Letterman has hundreds to choose from.

Being so shy I was afraid to look in a mirror, I resorted to newspaper ads when I was unmarried. I had good success with the opening line, "Understand men? Want one anyway?"

That would attract me because of the humor. When Shu was in college, he and his friends use to use, "So, what paper are you working on?" Everyone is working on a paper in college, so it was perfect!

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Can we assume that your successful pickup line did not run along those lines?

Well, not on the basis of asking the exact question, "How would you like to spent the next 43 minutes with me?" I concede.

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That would attract me because of the humor.

Humour is probably, next to power, the ultimate aphrodisiac. I didn't care for some of those David Letterman lines - but most did have the advantage of being (potentially, anyway) humorous. Just so long as the intended seductee (?) found the lines funny.

I honestly don't remember any guy at a party actually using a pick-up line on me. I do remember being in conversations with guys, but maybe I was just never anyone's type. My husband maintains that I just didn't notice the pick-up lines and that I have probably left a long line of very sad guys in my wake.

The other night, though, I was out for karaoke with one of my girl friends and a drunk sat down at the bar next to me and slurred "Areyoureallygonnasing?" I think maybe he was trying to at least get a conversation going, in which he was successful, but as my friend and I were sober and are reasonably intelligent the conversation was really just so we could make him slur more words so we could chuckle. I mean, really! When he actually asked me to thumb-wrestle I began totally shutting him down. <still laughing>

Thinking about it, I guess that's the key to being witty. You need to be sober enough to know the difference between being amusing and being the butt of the joke yourself.

Letterman's line, "I've done it with both Harley and Davidson" says more than he knows. There was just one William Harley, but Arthur Davidson had about a dozen brothers, several of whom were involved in building crotch rockets.