My sister was claustrophobic. She didn’t like enclosed spaces and suffered from a malady which may have derived from the first time Santa got stuck in a chimney. I know a lot of kids suffer from hydrophobia when it’s time for a bath on Saturday. But I didn’t know that many people exhibit coulrophobia as this story will illustrate. It’s a fear of clowns.

One interesting aspect of the story revolves around the statement by the police chief of Bakersfield, CA, who said that even though the clowns have nor committed any crimes, if they are found, they will be arrested. I hope he’s just clowning around.

Lots of kids have coulrophobia.

The article did say the clowns carried weapons, proof. That may be "arrestable" behavior.

quote:

the clowns carried weapons

Some "copycat" clowns. However, the chief made the point that no crimes had been committed, even though weapons were in view, since mere possession of a gun in most states is not a crime (especially long guns as opposed to concealable weapons). So why would clowns without weapons be subject to arrest?

I think it's a slippery slope to say that having weapons is not a crime. Any kind of a threat makes it a crime. At any rate, for your question, you are right. No weapons - no crime.

Clowns do make many kids scared, though.

After reading those links, now I am coulrophobic, too.

BTW, Geoff read this thread (where is he when we need him???) and had this to say:

quote:

Clipped from the blurb on the clown movie, "Blood Harvest:" " ...you can’t help but get a pit in your stomach on this one."

He's right. "pit" was misused, right?

You get a bad feeling in "the pit of your stomach."

And if you get a bad feeling today because it's Halloween, then you may be suffering from Samhainophobia, which is a fear of this holiday. According to some sources, the main reason Daylight Savings Time is extended into November is lobbying by the candy industry when the dates were being discussed in Congress. The candy people wanted daylight when the kids were out getting their loot, thereby insuring bigger profits for the manufacturers. Several billion this year must seem sweet to them.

A news story the other day said, "The car hit a telephone pole, splitting it in two."

What does "it" refer to? The car, or the pole?

Not quite a news story but a place mat on a hospital tray had the message "Have a Happy New Year's."

Oh, dear. Another apostrophe catastrophe!

I also like the one about being split in two. I have no idea what they meant, though I suppose it's the car.

quote:

Originally posted by Kalleh:
I also like the one about being split in two. I have no idea what they meant, though I suppose it's the car.

Then you do have idea about what they meant!

I think you suppose correctly. It's potentially ambiguous, but it's not practically ambiguous.

quote:

but it's not practically ambiguous.

It is ambiguous since "it" isn't defined.

I disagree on this example goofy because I certainly took it to mean the telephone pole. If you and Kalleh took it one way and I took it the other it is practically ambiguous too. The degree to which it is ambiguous could easily be researched by providing the sentence to a thousand readers and asking which way they read it.

quote:

Originally posted by Proofreader:

It is ambiguous since "it" isn't defined.

It's potentially ambiguous since "it" has two possible referents. But our knowledge of the real world tells us that one of the referents is much more likely than the other. Doesn't it?

quote:

Originally posted by BobHale:
I disagree on this example goofy because I certainly took it to mean the telephone pole.

Really? Is cars splitting telephone poles in half something that happens a lot down your way?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: goofy,

quote:

Is cars splitting telephone poles in half something that happens a lot down your way?

I find it highly likely the pole would split, depending on the angle at which it was hit.

However, in the case at hand, it was the car.

It seems to me more likely that something made of wood would split than something made of metal and designed to be robust.
Without knowing the story in detail, I'd read that as splitting the pole every time.

Alright, that's fair enough.

Now that I think about it, probably it did mean the telephone pole. I've not heard of a car being split in half, have you?

quote:

Originally posted by Kalleh:
Now that I think about it, probably it did mean the telephone pole. I've not heard of a car being split in half, have you?

Yes, but from a side impact.

quote:

I've not heard of a car being split in half, have you?

As Geoff noted about side impact, I've actually seen one.

Saw this in today's newspaper.

It's not a big deal. I have sketch from Germany with cursive writing on it that I can't read because it's some sort of German cursive. So I'll learn it if I have to.

I find this article way over the top. Kids will never be able to read their parents' letters! Transcribe them now or they'll be lost forever! If my parents wrote letters in a writing style I couldn't read, I'd learn it.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: goofy,

I still write checks.

I think we'll continue to see cursive, though not as much. Let's face it, sometimes you simply can't read the handwriting. Have you ever seen your physician's handwriting. Whew! it is amazing there aren't more medication errors, and there already are a lot because of deciphering the writing. Fortunately most hospitals in the U.S. are going to computer charting.

We've discussed this before here.

Phil Proctor had the following in his newsletter:

READ ALL ABOUT IT

The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country.
The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the country.
The New York Times is read by people who think they should run the country, and who are
very good at crossword puzzles.
USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the country but don’t really understand The New York
Times. They do, however, like their statistics shown in pie charts.
The Los Angeles Times is read by people who
wouldn’t mind running the country, if they could find the time -- and if they didn’t have to leave Southern California to do it.
The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents
used to run the country and did a poor job of it, thank you very much.
The New York Daily News is read by people who aren’t too sure who’s running the country and don’t really care as long as they can get a seat on the train.
The New York Post is read by people who don’t care who is running the country as long as they do something really scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.
The Chicago Tribune is read by people who are in prison that used to run the state, and
would like to do so again, as would their constituents that are currently free on bail.
The Miami Herald is read by people who are interested in another country, but need the baseball scores.
The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren’t sure if there is a country or that anyone is running it; but if so, they oppose all that they stand for. (There are occasional exceptions if the leaders are gay, handicapped, minority,feminist, atheist dwarfs who also happen to be illegal aliens from any other country or galaxy, provided of course, that they are not Republicans).
The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at the grocery store.
The Seattle Times is read by people who have recently caught a fish and need something to wrap it in.
And I know it must be true, because I read it in The Toilet

That's a rip-off (possibly a homage, if I'm feeling charitable) of a famous passage in the BBC TV comedy Yes Minister (although that itself was not original).

Hacker: Don't tell me about the press. I know exactly who reads the papers: the Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country; The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country; The Times is read by people who actually do run the country; the Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country; the Financial Times is read by people who own the country; the The Morning Star is read by people who think the country ought to be run by another country; and The Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.
Sir Humphrey: Prime Minister, what about the people who read The Sun?
Bernard: Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits.

Yes, there is nothing new under The Sun.

Very funny, Proof. It figures that it originally came from England. The Tribune one is funny.

Soon after the original Yes Minister was broadcast in the early 1980s a new paper came out, the Daily Star, that copied the same tabloid format and content (sports, 'celebrities', tits and minimal news) as The Sun, but less successfully.

The comment was made later that it goes to show that there is something new under The Sun.

How is "tit" used there?

quote:

Originally posted by Kalleh:
How is "tit" used there?

Unstintingly. They're dotted around all over the place, rather than just appearing on Page 3 as in the Sun.

On-line headline: Bill Gates Says You Should Worry About Artificial Intelligence

If it's no better than the natural kind, I'm scared s**%less!

In a story about the fight to appoint Mrs. Lynch as Attorney General, this statement was included: "....preparing a tranche of questions for her...."

Is that a proper use for the word "tranche"?

No, not even metaphorically.

I don't get it.

Just read a story about a man from Georgia who was accused of murder in New Jersey. Police linked him to the crime even though he had ABSOLUTE proof he was nowhere near NJ on the night of the murder. His boss had a videotape of him working in GA, but police never checked it out and extradited him to NJ. There he spent six months in jail protesting his innocence, totally ignored even though DNA evidence exonerated him and pointed to the real culprit. Eventually, his lawyer prevailed and he was released, to no job and family problems.
That's bad, right? Unfairly prosecuted, etc.
No, the bad part is --- they wouldn't release him until he paid a $30 administrative fee, which he did just to get out, and they didn't send him back to GA, either.

He should sue. He has a great case. There are a few like that here in Illinois, and they have won cases against persistent, but totally factless, prosecutors.

It isn't often that modern science can have a beneficial result for humans but this is one of the best strokes of genius in years.

Strokes of genius? Dumb guys jack off too.

Chipewyan baby name not allowed on N.W.T. birth certificate

This article makes it sound like the ʔ character is so important that it couldn't be represented any other way. But other languages of the area use an apostrophe to represent the glottal stop.

The ʔ was borrowed from the International Phonetic Alphabet by whoever developed the Chipewyan orthography. However, Chipewyan and some other languages have two forms of the character for upper and lower case: ʔ ɂ

I see my "factless" just went over your heads.

It is in one Onelook dictionary - Wordnik. Makes sense for a word. I made up another word the other day. I was talking about writing an article where there would be commentary from three experts. I called them "commentarians."

quote:

Strokes of genius? Dumb guys jack off too.

Just in case you get some of these, now you know at least where they originated.

From the /this Is True website:

First West of England’s new “Bio-Bus” will run on 2 in more ways than one. The line it’s scheduled on, between Cribbs Causeway and Stockwood in Bristol, England, is known as Service 2, and the fuel it runs on comes from something popularly called “number 2.” The bus will take on fuel from a plant that generates methane from human waste and food waste; its suppliers include 32,000-plus households near Service 2’s route. A bus company official said the bus “should help to open up a serious debate about how buses are best fueled, and what is good for the environment.” (AC/Sky News)
...And that debate will no doubt provide plenty of fuel for the No. 2 bus.

What's in a name? Would you like to be saddled with this one?

German for "fox?" Not quite; that's "fuchs." And where'd they get "Guy" from the Portuguese name for William? I say it's all fuched up!

Why am I reminded of Guy Fawkes?

Maybe dialectal German.

I wonder how many people pronounce it "Foo-Key."

Then there's the fictional character Hyacinth Bucket on the Britcom Keeping Up Appearances. She pronounces it, "Bouquet."

They were warned that a ban supposedly only effecting LGBT people was not a good idea and indeed it now seems to have bitten their ass.

Just received this press release:

Microsoft's Latest Venture

News just in of Microsoft's latest venture: Microsoft Corporation has taken another step toward dominating every aspect of American life with the introduction of Contraceptive2015, a suite of applications designed for users who engage in sex. Microsoft has been a pioneer in peer-to-peer connectivity and plug and play.

It believes these technologies will give it substantial leverage in penetrating the copulation enhancement market. The product addresses two important user concerns: the need for virus protection and the need for a firewall to ensure the non-propagation of human beings.

The Contraceptive2015 suite consists of three products: Condom2015, DeFetus 1.0 (from Sementec), and AIDScan 2.1 (from Norton Utilities). A free copy of Intercourse Explorer 4.0 is bundled in the package. The suite also comes in two expanded versions. Contraceptive98 Professional is the Client/Server edition, for professionals in the sexual services sector. Contraceptive2015 Small Business Edition is a package for startups, aimed at the housewife and gigolo niches.

While Contraceptive2015 does not address nontraditional copulatory channels, future plug-ins are planned for next year.

OPERATION: Only one node in a peer-to-peer connection needs to install the package.

At installation, the Condom2015 software checks for minimum hardware. If the user meets the requirements, the product installs and is sufficiently scaleable to meet most requirements. After installation, operation commences. One precaution is that the user must be sure they have sufficient RAM to complete the session. When the session is complete, a disconnect is initiated, and the user gets the message, it is now safe to turn off your partner.

DRAWBACKS: Usability testers report that frequent failures were a major concern during beta testing. General Protection Fault was the most serious error encountered. Early versions had numerous bugs, but most of these have been eliminated. The product needs to be installed each time its used.

CONCLUSION: Contraceptive2015 is a robust product. Despite its drawbacks, it is reasonably good value for its $49.95 price tag, and is far superior to its shareware version. Hopefully, future releases (of the software, that is) will add missing functionality, such as Backout and Restore, uninterruptible Power Supply and Onboard Camera.

Microsoft CEO Bill Gates is optimistic that "Our contraceptive products will help users do to each other what we've been doing to our customers for years."