Ask Amy appears in the Chicago Tribune, and she has asked her readers for some word ideas. If I get some good answers, I will send them to the Ask Amy column.

Here's the question:

Somebody asked why middle-aged and older people use the terms "girlfriend" and "boyfriend." Amy answered that, while they do sound juvenile, there isn't a better word. "Partner," she says, sounds too "business like." I think it sounds too serious.

What can you come up with?

In at least one instance Prince Charles's ... um ... er ... was referred to as his "paramour, but the writer was apparently taking dictation and apparently knew no French, so it was printed as "power mower."

This message has been edited. Last edited by: jerry thomas,

I like paramour, but what about lover?

quote:

Originally posted by arnie:
I like paramour, but what about lover?

But Arnie, you can be a girlfriend or boyfriend without being a lover. There's much to be said for making words mean what they say: friend, M or F.
I hate partner as a modern euphemism, especially when a legally married person introduces his/her spouse as 'my partner'. They may or may not be ashamed of their marriage, but partner to me suggests a nexus, a co-worker or business-linked associate, not an imputation of sharing the same sheets. As for lover, let's leave that for another day?

"Lover" doesn't necessarily mean that there is a sexual relationship. I realise that it usually does in this era, but until fairly recently many couples (or at least one of the couple) were virgins on marriage.

quote:

Originally posted by arnie:
but until fairly recently many couples (or at least one of the couple) were virgins on marriage.

Not for 40+ yrs, where I live!

"Loved one," perhaps?

P.S."Power mower"? I'm guffawing here, Jerry!

My hometown newspaper once reported that a local youth group had just returned from a trip to NYC, where they saw the Broadway musical Lame Is Rob.

Of course, has the reporter call it "Lez Mizz" - as most here seem to, there would have been no confusion;-) Poorly pronounced French is a fine breeding ground for malapropisms.

"Power mower"

I heard the other day, for the umpteenth time, the hyperforeignistic coup de gras, literally 'blow of fat', instead of coup de grace. One often hears tête à tee 'head to tea', too.

A couple of years ago my old hometown's weekly newspaper reported on the graduation of a "DARE" group. Included was a list of the "extinguished" [sic] guests, the most prominent of which was the priest from the local "Espistable"[sic] Church, who was the main speaker.

Of course I wrote a Letter to the Editor. I asked what kind of dope the Editor was using. I also asked if the Fire Chief was put out when he discovered that he was not on the Extinguished Guest List.

The Editor never replied.

quote:

Somebody asked why middle-aged and older people use the terms "girlfriend" and "boyfriend." Amy answered that, while they do sound juvenile, there isn't a better word.

Perhaps this is oversimplistic, but how about following the same pattern but aging the terminology?

Thus "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" would become lady friend and gentleman friend.

quote:

The Editor never replied.

In my considerable experience of writing letters to the press, I have found that there is a hierarchy that determines whether of not you get published.

Letters criticising the journal in any way will usually be ignored; self-promotional letters will usually get ignored; letters of praise of the journal, if not too blatant, will get published; controversial letters, especially those related to an ongoing story, will almost always get published.

I had a controversial letter published just last week in Travel Trade Gazette; I wrote a critical letter last week to Travel Weekly that will almost certainly not get published (but I'll let you know).

quote:

Originally posted by shufitz:
Thus "girlfriend" and "boyfriend" would become lady friend and gentleman friend.

Sounds a touch forced and artificial, but such terms are in fairly common usage, though often evoking a wry smile from the listener.
In any case, most of us oldies retain the sentiments of youth, so why change the terminology even if we are not boys and girls any longer.

I've been thinking about this, and I think "friend" works the best. "Lover" just sounds too sexual to me. Same with "paramour," though I do love it. While I also like "lady friend" and "gentleman friend," I tend to agree with Pearce that they are a bit forced. I suppose I could suggest "power mower" too. Any others?

Beau, perhaps, for a boyfriend. "My guy", or "my gal/girl", if you are at a stage where you don't mind the implication of possessing each other

A word for parents to use in referring to their "children's" playmates ...


"Ummer," as in ..... "This is our wayward son Reginald and this is Chantilly, his ... um .... er.."

quote:

... son Reginald and this is Chantilly, his ... um .... er.."

I've only heard of that construction being used in cases like "... son Reginald and this is Roberto, his ... um ... er..."

I've only heard of that construction being used in cases like "... son Reginald and this is Roberto, his ... um ... er..."

This is basically what I've heard. In fact amongst some of my friends ummer is the standard word for MOTSS-friends, but I suppose it could've been extended into use by parents for other of their children's relationships.