This is inspired by Kalleh's "Pleasingly Plump" thread.

Columnist Sidney Harris often used the following format to illustrate how an appropriately-chosen adjective can give a concept either a positive spin or a negative one:

I am pleasingly plump.
You could lose a few pounds.
He is fat.

I am principled.
You are stubborn.
He is pigheaded.

Mr. Harris died long enough ago that I can't find his examples on the web. But no doubt we can concoct our own.

My friend Susan, a psychotherapist, has the saying, "There are two sides to this, my reasonable, sensible one, and your stupid, assinine one!"

And my father says: "Am I right or am I right?" Argue with that!

""Am I right or am I right?" Argue with that!"
_____________________________

Inflection is everything! What if he said, "Am I right, or AM I right?"

I just came across this example: I am a careful writer; you are a purist; he is a pedant.

... my mother :

"Dearest, Look at my son mathematics marks !!...!.?"

and later

"Roger !#;! Look at your son literature marks !?$@"%$*@

Now you know !?
... why I'm rather ... computer savvy !

Safi

I am sensitive; you can't take a joke; he is thin-skinned.

I am frank; you can be insensitive; he is a tactless boor.

I am thorough; you are persnickity; he is anal-compulsive.

The pessimist complains about the wind.

The optimist expects it to change.

The leader adjusts the sails.

i'm a plump, pink love child. you're a fat bastard.p

Yesterday, browsing through a used book store, I found a copy of The Best of Sydney Harris. From which are culled the following (more to follow later, perhaps):

I am cautious; you are timid; he is cowardly.

My cutting remark is an epigram; yours is a wisecrack; his is a cheap jeer.

I am taking medication; you are on pills; he is doing dope.

I am a man of few words; you are taciturn; he is unresponsive.

I am cautious.
You are slow.
He is lazy.

I am a careful shopper.
You are thrifty.
She is cheap.

(I know it's stretching...)

I'm an angel
You are nice
He is down to earth

An old Victorian truism:

Men perspire;
Women glow;
Horses sweat.

I remember some years ago when Prince Andrew was about to marry Sarah Fergusson after a number of fairly high profile good looking girlfriends. There was a joke that went

Wanted Koo Stark,
Would have settled for Katie Rabbet
Ended up with Sarah Fergusson.

Habent Abdenda Omnes Praeter Me ac Simiam Meam

Read all about my travels around the world here.

My teenage daughter is sociable and friendly; your is boycrazy; his is a slut.

I dress casually; you are sloppy; she threw her outfit together in the dark.

I am a trusting soul; you are naive; he is a dupe.

I have a childlike playfulness; you can be immature; he needs to grow up.