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An IRS poem Login/Join
 
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Picture of Kalleh
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For those of you who live in the U.S., you know that this was the week of the IRS. Loved this parody on "The Night Before Christmas." I know the scansion doesn't always work. But it's funny, don't you think?

The Tax Man Cometh

April 16, 2012|By John McCarron

'Twas the night before taxes,

And all through the house,

Not a creature was stirring,

And I felt such a louse.

W-2s and 1040s I had spread on the table,

Having pushed off the task for as long as I was able.

My little deductions they had earlier gone to bed,

After seeing their dad with steam rising from his head.

Then out of my throat there arose such a hue,

For when I summed up, there were big taxes due.

So I redid some entries, doubled deductions, claimed credits.

Only to see by the manual how bogus were my edits.

With pencil and calculator I had dodged and had wangled,

Yet the more I computed, the more it got tangled.

So I reached for my checkbook in a fit of duress,

And wrote out the Big One to the bleeping IRS.

But as I licked-tight the envelope the more I got thinking,

There's something about this system that surely is stinking.

The president wants a "Buffett Rule" to catch tax evaders,

But Mitt Romney says higher rates only punish "job creators."

Obama must be careful here for investors they're not snoring.

Raise taxes today and tomorrow they'll be off-shoring.

Now Cayman Isles, now Switzerland, now Dutch Antilles,

Why, Mitt alone has enough stashed to give voters the willies.

Rather the right would chop deductions using sharp budget axes,

No more claiming your home mortgage or your property taxes.

Got to lean on the little guy so Mr. Big will keep hiring.

Got to cut back on "gumint." Cops and teachers we'll be firing.

Better yet, pass a flat tax, so simple and so pure.

We'll all pay like hedge-funders … not so hard to endure.

'Course we'll need to cap Medicare. We can hand out some vouchers.

Again we'll cut welfare. Let us root out the moochers.

Go to cut back on borrowing, as much as we can.

Unless, that is, we need to take on Iran.

To maintain our freedom we shall spare no expense.
 
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Picture of bethree5
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Very cute, Kalleh!.. if they ever agree to delete the property tax deduction, that'll be the end of NJ..
 
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Picture of Kalleh
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The end of Illinois, too!

By the way, here is the link to it.
 
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