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1 Still keen to thrill his Jill from Rhyl, Phil found his "Bill" would no more fill. When the dildo daddled Old Phil was addled - A bitter Pill gave Jill her thrill. 2 In Wales I had quite a thrill In a seaside resort town called Rhyl. I met a great guy We had sex on the fly And then he was off to Brazil. 3 Night fishermen picking in Rhyl Go starkers and harvest a thrill, Baring mussels and cockles And causing debacles As local gals screech loud and shrill. 4 The food fish way up in Welsh Rhyl Isn’t tuna nor naught with a gill They call it a cockle It tastes like pig’s knockle It’s killer when fried on the grill. 5 A seamstress a-sewing in Rhyl Was stiffed on presenting her bill. "Though my fingers ooze pain, All my work was in vain. That's the last time I sew Kalleh's twill." 6 There was a young man from Rhyl, Who swallowed an explosive pill. His bollocks went clang, His goolies went bang, And his dick shot over a hill! 7 On a journey to beautiful Rhyl My toothache became very shrill. I went to a dentist (I hope no apprentice!) Who said, "Drill and we'll drill and then fill!" 8 Went up to the beaches of Rhyl With my thrill of the month, Joanie Jill. She got into the pockles Where I keeps my cockles And I am still paying the bill. 9 Bill and Jill ran a still up in Rhyl. Near the mill, empty bottles they'd fill. This booze some though was great; Others viewed it with hate And complained that it tasted like swill. 10 I must live in our old house in Rhyl, The decrepit estate on the hill. You can laugh. It's not funny. If I leave, I lose money. It's stated quite plain in Dad's will. "No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson. | ||
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Wow, those are really great. This selection is going to be hard! Love the one about Kalleh! | |||
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<Proofreader> |
Someone has to vote and break the tie. | ||
Member |
It's always so interesting. I wrote two and much preferred one over the other. Yet the one I liked least got a vote. It's also interesting how sometimes one will be a slam dunk, though other times (like now) the votes are all over the place. | |||
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Here are the authors 1 Greg Still keen to thrill his Jill from Rhyl, Phil found his "Bill" would no more fill. When the dildo daddled Old Phil was addled - A bitter Pill gave Jill her thrill. 2 Kslleh In Wales I had quite a thrill In a seaside resort town called Rhyl. I met a great guy We had sex on the fly And then he was off to Brazil. 3 bethree5 Night fishermen picking in Rhyl Go starkers and harvest a thrill, Baring mussels and cockles And causing debacles As local gals screech loud and shrill. 4 bethree5 The food fish way up in Welsh Rhyl Isn’t tuna nor naught with a gill They call it a cockle It tastes like pig’s knockle It’s killer when fried on the grill. 5 proofreader A seamstress a-sewing in Rhyl Was stiffed on presenting her bill. "Though my fingers ooze pain, All my work was in vain. That's the last time I sew Kalleh's twill." 6 arnie There was a young man from Rhyl, Who swallowed an explosive pill. His bollocks went clang, His goolies went bang, And his dick shot over a hill! 7 Kalleh On a journey to beautiful Rhyl My toothache became very shrill. I went to a dentist (I hope no apprentice!) Who said, "Drill and we'll drill and then fill!" 8 bethree5 Went up to the beaches of Rhyl With my thrill of the month, Joanie Jill. She got into the pockles Where I keeps my cockles And I am still paying the bill. 9 proofreader Bill and Jill ran a still up in Rhyl. Near the mill, empty bottles they'd fill. This booze some though was great; Others viewed it with hate And complained that it tasted like swill. 10 proofreader I must live in our old house in Rhyl, The decrepit estate on the hill. You can laugh. It's not funny. If I leave, I lose money. It's stated quite plain in Dad's will. And the winner is number 3 penned by bethree5, which, had it come down to it, would also have got my deciding vote. "No man but a blockhead ever wrote except for money." Samuel Johnson. | |||
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Congratulations, Bethree! The baton is yours. | |||
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<Proofreader> |
My typo in L3 of number 9 9thought) was fatal. | ||
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I voted for #10. | |||
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I had to vote for Proof's Kalleh limerick. | |||
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As a very irregular contributor, I was pleasantly surprised that mine (6) got a vote. Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life. | |||
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As a very regular contributor, I was disappointed that mine (1) didn't get a vote. Regards Greg | |||
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<Proofreader> |
If at first you don't succeed, cheat. | ||
Member |
Hmm - now how could I have done that I wonder? Ah yes of course a secret late vote for my own when the contest is already over, would have done it I guess. But I'd probably end up feeling even worse, so no point really. Just have to come up with a better limerick next time. Regards Greg | |||
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And I'd vote for it again. The last line is hiLARious. | |||
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Will post a new location as soon as I think of one | |||
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arnie, I almost voted for yours. Greg, I loved your rhymes and so wanted to make the meter work. I read it a number of times, even aloud, but I just couldn't make it work. | |||
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<Proofreader> |
It needed the "out" or some other word to make the meter work. | ||
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Hey, I think I already studied that book....and before it was written, no less. | |||
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<Proofreader> |
Those that can't do, teach. Those that can do write limericks. | ||
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I think I can do - and I teach, too. | |||
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