1
A naked pole dancer of York
Once twisted and spun with such torque
That the pole came unpegged
And she landed spread-legged
On the pole of a patron from Cork

2
My accent's non-rhotic. I talk
In a way that makes "stork" sound like "stalk."
So this should do the trick
For a fine limerick
On the place that you've chosen (that's York.)

3
A yodeling yokel of York
Eschewed chewing food from a fork
Knives mangled his maw
And spoons stuck in his craw
But yodeling's fine with a spork

4
There once was a fellow of York
Who ate nothing other than pork
And beans. He was fated
To be constipated
So guess what he did with his fork?

5
A rabbi who worshipped in York
Looked askance at his plateful of pork.
Said, "It's surely not kosher!"
And "What could be gaucher?"
And "How did it get on my fork?"

6
Said King Charles, "Now then Andrew, let's talk.
It seems that you're still Duke of York,
But each sight of your face
Just recalls your disgrace,
So York PA is now where you can walk.

7
A silly young woman of York
Averred babies come from a stork
But nasty old Clancy
Pulled off her pants - he
Showed how they come twixt 'er fork

----------------

Well, Folks, that's the lot. Let the Voting begin!

Number one is a clear winner

I'll pick five. #1 doesn't consider that the patron from Cork may have had Payronies disease.

Were there only two of us who submitted limericks?
Maybe we ought to move this game to Farcebok, They've got an active pun group there, so why not lims?

Interesting. So far there's a two-way tie, so I'll muddy the waters further and elevate Number 4.

Do the Roolz say anything about a three-way tie?

I looked at the limericks on Fartsbook, and they're not allowed to be naughty. Forget that idea!

As for de roolz, did anyone write two that got votez? Might you break ties that way? With so few participants does it matter?

<Drumroll, please>
___________________________

1.
A naked pole dancer of York
Once twisted and twirled with such torque
That the pole came unpegged
And she landed spread-legged
On the pole of a patron from Cork
--Geoff

2
My accent's non-rhotic. I talk
In a way that makes "stork" sound like "stalk."
So this should do the trick
For a fine limerick
On the place that you've chosen (that's York.)
--BobHale

3
A yodeling yokel of York
Eschewed chewing food from a fork
Kives mangled his maw
Spoons stuck in his craw
But yodeling's fine with a spork
--Geoff

4
There once was a fellow of York
Who ate nothing other than pork
And beans. He was fated
To be constipated
So guess what he did with his fork?
--Geoff

5
A rabbi who worshipped in York
Looked askance at his plateful of pork.
Said, "It's surely not kosher!"
And "What could be gaucher?"
And "How did it get on my fork?"
--haberdasher

6
Said King Charles, "Now then Andrew, let's talk.
It seems that you're still Duke of York,
But the sight of your face
Just recalls your disgrace,
So York PA is now where you can walk.
--BobHale

7
A silly young woman of York
Averred babies come from a stork
But nasty old Clancy
Pulled off her pants - he
Showed how they come twixt 'er fork
--Geoff
_________________________

So. 1 is Geoff. 4 is Geoff. 5 is hab.

Looks like you're are the winner, Geoff, and thereby the designated Tour Guide for the next round for your next assignment, if you choose to accept it.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: haberdasher,

Only THREE who submitted limericks??? If someone knows how to contact Bethree5, and we can induce Tinman, Shufitz and Kalleh to contribute, I'd say it's worth continuing. Otherwise???

I'm B-A-A-A-A-CK!
Sorry to be such a crummy teammate. The last month has been hairy in various ways, but am now onsite in fave vacation spot for a while, and ready to lim.
In case you doubt my enthusiasm, please note I STILL-- after all these years-- eschew counting sheep in favor of composing limericks as a sleeping potion. [Wait... that may not be a recommendation ]

Geoff you certainly took the cake with this one, far and away my fave. Hope we'll hear from you on a new location soon!

Whish is your fave? I'll pick a destination right soon and let you do your best/worst - never what to say about lims!