Just because I thought it would be fun...

Here's a little game for Saint Valentine's Day. I'd like you to compose the worst possible lonely hearts ad and PM it to me. I got the idea from
this and this.

Let's see how humorously and creatively alone we can be!

A romantic TV dinner for one in your very own living room is offered as the prize. (Of course you will need to purchase and microwave it yourself.)

You've got mine, Bob.

I've sent along some entries