My friend overheard her ten-year-old son praying "Give us this day our jelly bread. (True story)
Another that I like but can't verify ... the preacher overheard his son, together with his ten-year-old friends, having a funeral for a dead bird .... "Glory be to the Father, and to the Son , into the hole he goes."
(original official version says, "and to the Holy Ghost")
A man visited relatives in Texas and went with them to see their church's Christmas pageant. He was surprised to note that all the participants weree dressed in traditional Biblical garb except the Three Wise Men. They were wearing fireman's hats.
On the way home, he asked his relative about the hats.
"Why, boy," she said. "That there's all part of the Bible story. Don't you New Yorkers know anythang?"
"I'm sorry," he said, "but it don't recall anything like that mentioned in the Bible."
His relative opened her Good Book and pointed to the passage, reading aloud, "... and the Three Wise Men came from afar . . . "
That's a new and valuable addition to the Collection. As the Innkeeper in Bethlehem was fond of saying, "HOW WAS I TO KNOW?"
Another long-concealed part of the story is ..... one of those Wise Men (his Fireman's Helmet temporarily shoved aside) happened to step on a rake that had been left, tines up, on the floor. The handle of the rake come up and whopped him between the eyes and he shouted, "Jesus Christ!"
Whereupon the young couple, who had been discussing what to name the kid, agreed that that name had a nice ring to it. Amen.
And it came to pass that as that same young man was wandering the countryside preaching, he came upon a young woman about to be stoned for adultery. And he said unto the crowd, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." And a large rock hurtled over their heads and smashed the woman in the face. And he turned and said, "I thought I told you to knock that stuff off, Ma."
After his funeral coach broke down, the undertaker had to rehearse.
Following her mastectomy, the film starlet was repaired.This message has been edited. Last edited by: <Proofreader>,
They removed the booths from the turnpike so the road is now extolled.
While trying to think of another word, I remembered a portion of an old joke about the man who was trying to have a child. But it didn't work and he told his buddies his wife was impregnable. But one buddy said she was inconceivable. There was a third term which I can't remember and it's driving me crazy. Who knows what it was?This message has been edited. Last edited by: <Proofreader>,