supercede: the Man of Steel's sperm
batman: what the Mrs. called the Count
judicious: challah, matzohs, and latkes

assemblage: tattoo on a butt

Today's [I]Shoe[/b] comic strip offered inspiration for the next one:

liability; a trait needed for success in politics.

Or, putting the shoe on the other foot (or someplace, anyway) -

ASSET - a pert little posterior

Also, not to ignore Dorothy Parker; "If all the starlets in Hollywood were laid end to end, I wouldn't be surprised." - that's another kind of lie-ability...

possibility: what a gang can accomplish

DISCUSS - wash your mouth out with soap

CORSET - Then ahead, Warp 3, Commander Data. Make it so.

COMPOST - invitation to join a porn site

PERSIFLAGE - beat over the head with a heavy pocketbook

persiflage: to wear the same colors as your pocketbook to blend in.
perrywinkle: what Mr. Mason does to indicate he's fooled the jury.

IMPROMPTU - both little devils having a good time

IRRELEVANT - a Colocasia gigantea plant

forum: and I like vodka, too.
Labrador retriever: what you call a garbage man in St. John's.

bandage: music performed while in restraints.
over-protective: doubled condoms
edgewise: a honing expert
cattycorner: gossip central
pork chop: a low blow in karate

CALISTHENICS - a logy lily

INTERLOCUTOR- to bury the Speaker.
(Don't we wish, sometimes.)

HANSEATIC - Johnny, go find your Dutch Grandpa's ice skates

INEFFABLE - somehow you just can't swear at it

insecure: a locked motel

Did you know people used to let mosquitoes bite them to infect themselves with malaria to treat their syphilis? It's true. The high fever was poorly tolerated by the spirochetes.

Now that's an INSECURE if ever there was one!

Arguing with the Russian President:DISPutin'

offhand: the penalty for thieves in Saudi Arabia.
officiate: why did he have an upset stomach?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: <Proofreader>,

quote:

Originally posted by Proofreader:officiate: why did he have an upset stomach?

OFFAL - what he ate, and how he felt

excrete: banished from the island

mountebank:where Canadian police keep money.

convent also conduct: a pipe bringing fresh air into a cell.
concave: a hiding place from the law.
convex: to irritate a prisoner.
contempt: work release
convocation; what a prisoner aspires to
conspire: a prison belfry

debunk: toss out of bed
demonstrate; a non-gay devil
devoted: no election for you
down-trodden: a stepped-on duck
Iowa: in her debt

Idaho - admits she's a tramp
Alaska - but will she give you the answer
Utah - Thank you too
Florida - Had a bit more to drink than usual

Vagina: found next to Washington, DC.
truculent: here's the 18-wheeler I borrowed.
trailer trash: what the sheriff removes during the eviction
The Joy of Sex: Enclosed is your free sample of Viagra

This message has been edited. Last edited by: <Proofreader>,

PARALLAX - I need something Oh, and I need something else, too.

TOTEM POLE - that guy from Krakow will carry anything.

Virginia: A state men seek to discover that they may enter and inhabit it.

GENIAL - like a Genie (Djinn, if you insist)

dogma: a bitch
rabies: more than one ruby
sleepwalkers: Congress

Do I dare?

[strikethrough]PELEAS[/strikethrough]PELLÉAS - a Brazilian soccer fan doing animal things after a World Cup loss

[Edit: correct spelling]

This message has been edited. Last edited by: haberdasher,

DISASTER - a flower was removed (see also LACKADAISICAL)

quote:

DISASTER

What happened when the blonde backed into the propeller.

primate: a busy-body wife
conceal: a prisoner's pinniped
contribute what is paid to the leader of a prison gang

If Lysol prevents tissue necrosis, is it a disinfarctant?

antacid: LSD for insects

ANTIPATHY - dislike of the cured meats, fresh cheeses, olives, and herbs served at the start of an Italian meal

and similarly

ANTIMONY - in favor of the barter system

ALABAMA - the President's son Alfred

BOARDING - a dent inside the barrel of my rifle

DILETTANTE - ring up my Father's sister who lives in France

If you're out of wax paper, trifoil.
Ask the doctor about your operation, and he'll tell you what you're info.
assess; a female donkey
unpack: a secret political organization that won't accept donations
squash: a bug between two bricks

recurred: damn dog is pregnant again
remitted:Romney might run again
retard: fixed the driveway
largesse: what the Kardashian girls have

ARIAL - a type of Iranian money

APHID - an advanced degree in entymology

ANOREXIA - a vacuum cleaner that won't take in any dirt [alert: UScentric]

ANODYNE - a medicine to relieve pain, but without any force (compare ANNOUNCE)

ANDIRON - what else to do with the wash

ANODE What Shelly wrote to a Grecian Urn. Not the opposiite of a cathode, which a poem about a Cathar.

BTW, "retard" is what local folks do when the tread's all gone. And "boarding" can't be a dent in your rifle 'cuz it's spelt rong. It must be a dent in a hog.

No, you silly, "retard" is how you describe folks who got to be 65 and stopped workin.

And listening to all these long silly stories when Ah could be out havin fun - that's whut Ah calls "boarding." Anode that all along.

specialize:what your girl has along with her great body.

MARGATE - where you get sent for spraying graffiti on the hinged fence opening

And Attica is where you get sent to live in the unfinished upstairs.

And retard at 65??? Hell, I wish!

Is the opposite of bacteria fronteria?

Attica is where you get sent to live in the unfinished upstairs - in Rome?

And a BACCHANAL is a minor side-street in Venice. Or possibly Amsterdam.

undertaker: a thief in Australia

Does the thief specialize in underwear?

Unscrupulous someone who's lost his threaded fastener tool.

[QUOTE]Originally posted by haberdasher:
Attica is where you get sent to live in the unfinished upstairs - in Rome?

No, New York.

Ats-a right, too!

Signed,
Chico

UNDERMINED = the Subconscious

automat: vending machine for cars
Federal Espresso: Italian coffee caterers