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I feel that you would be well advised to find a source - then maybe you wouldn't keep making so many mistakes. Royalty, even self-proclaimed royalty, often has the characteristic of belief in its divine infallibility! My grammatical points are not wrong; your corrections are. Find an independent source to prove yourself right and me wrong and I'll deign to respond. Richard English | |||
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That inveterate poster CJ uses language that's often agley. He speaks patois and cant both extinct and extant, but still gets it wrong anyway. Richard English [This message was edited by Richard English on Mon Feb 10th, 2003 at 13:22.] | |||
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A globe trotting lawyer named Mort, Saying travel's his favorite sport, Comes to grips with his grips When going on trips And takes his suitcases to court.  | |||
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To CJ's Quixote we've RE's Sancho Panza Swapping limericks in which every stanza Is minutely dissected Criticised and corrected:- The result is quite an extravaganza OK, the first line needs a strict diet - way too many syllables here. Last line's meter isn't apparent until you reread it and work with it a couple of times putting the stresses on "reSULT" and "EXtravaGANza." This one works better recited aloud than read. Good topic. C+ RE, on the subject of beers On the board is lacking in peers He is archetypal Kalleh's his disciple But they're boring poor CJ to tears I think the word "archetypal," while correctly used here, hurts you since it's not one easily pronounced in one's inner (poem-reading) ear. And the stress of "Kalleh's" comes out too easily as "ka-LA'S" to fit the limerick meter. Last line? God, yes, but maybe that's just me. To quote a greater mind than my own, "You may bore me to tears with your unending beery rantings but I'll defend to the death your right to drink them." (or whatever) C+ For the depth of research that he brings On all weird and wonderful things He surely should win an Award, so for Tinman "All hail" king of Googling kings Better! Though an improved first line, meter-wise, would be "For the depth of the research he brings" doncha think? The 3rd & 4th line rhyme is a challenge but one well worth taking and, additionally, very rewarding when one gets it. (Someone check with R.E. and explain it to him if necessary.) Well done! A solid "B." The King has spoken. | |||
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quote: "Limerick-challenged"?? Nonsense! No more so than R.E. and you, at least, acknowledge what few shortcomings you possess in this field. That puts you worlds ahead. Grade for your Asa limerick: Incomplete. This one's far too good to put out there with that horrible non-rhyme between the 3rd and 4th lines! Also suggest you present it in a regular font so that you can italicize the two Spanish words you use. Rework this one and resubmit. Your King is well pleased! Regarding your Arnie limerick, I could quibble about minor points regarding meter and make suggestions to fine tune it but, really, it's fine as it is, a "B". More please! | |||
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quote: First off, in the post before your limerick, you stated that if I were to accept certain impudent conditions, you would "deign to respond." Just seven minutes after that and, once again, you're responding. R.E., please! Inconsistency does not become you! Being a benevolent and forgiving monarch, I will address your latest offering. "That inveterate poster CJ" is a fine start. Perfect meter, the introduction of the main character, an easy rhyme to work with. All good. And it's about me which is always a plus, BUT "uses language that often aglay"??!! My God, could you be more obtuse?! Dictionary.com doesn't even have "aglay" and I'm led to try to divine its meaning as, possibly, being related to the quotation about something "oft gone aglay," meaning haywire, though God knows it could be anything. While the 5th line makes for a snappy punchline, lines 3 and 4 of the set-up to this supposed humor are so obviously plagiarized as to force me to consider the revocation of your poetic license. Bad show, R.E., truly horrible! It grieves me to dole out my first "F" and this to someone who previously had bragged about his ability regarding our beloved 5-lined verse. It is truly a sad day. Go have yourself several beers. | |||
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My goodness, I can't leave this thread on that last note. Allow me to immortalize a few more of our happy family with the following: Prison? Never! Either Behead Me or Find Me an Attractive American Divorcee A serious man is Bob Hale, So I thought as he'd act without fail As our Wordcrafter Bard Till he gave me his card: "Don't pass GO - Go directly to jail!" And, B.H., I agree with your assessment of our resident cyber-librarian extraordinaire: A Veritable Font, a FONT, I Say! I once asked TinMan out of deference, Just what kind of pie was his preference. What he gave me next Was 12 pages of text And 32 websites as reference! In R.E.'s Case, Of Course, First He'll Have to Apologize I am issuing this royal degree: All are welcome to criticize me. While a King does have clout, I can sure dish it out But also can take it, you see! In other words, any feedback or suggested rearrangement of my stuff is more than welcome. TKHS | |||
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To the King of the limerick, CJ, I'm submitting this verse to the fray, In hope that he'll find The presence of mind To dole out for once a grade A | |||
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It was Jerry Thomas who wrote those lines and asked for help in fitting them in. I helped and fitted them in. Not plagarism at all. And aglay is a perfectly good word which can be found in any good dictionary such as the OED. That it's not in Webster is a reflection on that publication not my word use. Even Robbie Burns used it "..The best laid plans o' mice and men gang oft aye aglay..." Richard English | |||
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quote: So does that mean you see CJ as a "Wee, sleeket, cowran, tim'rous beastie" ? Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum Read all about my travels around the world here. | |||
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Just a couple of thoughts on CJ's critique of my efforts. The Panza/stanza/extravaganza limerick The first line is long but with effort it is possible to force the stress onto the syllables to make it work. As it was intended to be spoken (as indeed all limericks should be) I'd like to petition for an upgrade - Maybe to a B-. I'll accept the C+ for the second limerick (though I have no problem with the stress) but feel I must point out that "You may bore me to tears with your unending beery rantings but I'll defend to the death your right to drink them." is suggesting that RE drinks his beery rantings. It's an unattached participle problem. Happy with the B for the last (wasn't convinced you'd appreciate the line 3/4 rhyme but glad you did.) I'm reminded that it isn't only vocabulary, grammar and punctuation that vary from US to UK. Stress and pronunciation also do. Early on on the board (one of my very first posts) I posted the limerick (which was about an old friend of mine) John Rawlinson treated with scorn Any food that had ever been born He would simply not eat A dish made with meat Though he would stretch a point for a prawn It generated considerable debate on whether prawn rhymes with scorn and born. The final answer - arrived at with the aid of dictionaries - was that it does for the English but not for the Americans. Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum Read all about my travels around the world here. | |||
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CJ sometimes drives himself frantic About the limerick's form he's pedantic If the metre's not right Then you're in for a fight As I will undoubtedly be with this one because the last line is gigantic Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum Read all about my travels around the world here. | |||
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. [This message was edited by TrossL on Thu Jun 5th, 2003 at 7:24.] | |||
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This is an absolutely hilarious--and talented--thread. I just love it! Thanks, LadyBeth for starting it!  I wanted to welcome jerry thomas to this thread, but there have been so many posts in between. Anyway, welcome back, jerry, and this time stay with us!   Love your limerick, museamuse! Come on, Morgan, give it a try! CJ, I knew about the poor rhyming of "girl" and "word", but chose a little "academic freedom" (or whatever it's called with limerick writers). I have a confession with that limerick, though. Shufitz helped me with the best rhyme of all, "cerveza". So--I'll let my incomplete grade stand, knowing that it will eventually turn into an "F". BTW, surely Richard did not deserve an "F"! You just didn't like the subject. And shame on you, CJ, for not knowing that "agley", in fact, does appear in OED. That may mean the dethroning of the King! Lastly, before I go back to writing my limerick for poor, neglected Shufitz, I want to ask this: will somebody please critique CJ's limericks? I don't have the background or I would be happy to. [This message was edited by Kalleh on Sun Feb 9th, 2003 at 12:10.] | |||
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Three points of authorship here. Louis Untermeyer's collection of childern's poetry includes both Jerry's "tutor who tooted the flute" and Kalleh's "fly and a flea in a flue", attributing them respectively to Carolyn Wells and to Anonymous. Anonymous also authored Jerry's fellow "who died in the fall", with a different opening. You can find further reference in the on-line source just given. The site's homepage states the published limerick books upon which it relied. | |||
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http://phrases.shu.ac.uk/meanings/62050.html Meaning Origin From Robert Burns' poem 'To a Mouse', 1786. It tells of how he, while ploughing a field, upturned a mouse's nest. The resulting poem is an apology to the mouse and goes on to say that 'the best laid schemes o' mice an' men, Gang aft a-gley'. | |||
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DICTIONARY a·gley adv. Scots Off to one side; awry. [a-2 + Scots gley, to squint (from Middle English glien, possibly of Scandinavian origin).] Source: The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved. Agley \A*gley"\, adv. Aside; askew. [Scotch] --Burns. * ** *** ***** ******** ***** *** ** * Knowing this, one is tempted to say, When ladies in pews show dismay, "The Kew Curate's revealing Deep spiritual feeling, To the point where his robe's gang agley!!" [This message was edited by jerry thomas on Mon Feb 10th, 2003 at 2:07.] | |||
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. [This message was edited by TrossL on Thu Jun 5th, 2003 at 7:25.] | |||
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Poor Shufitz is tiring of beer, As Kalleh must peer far and near. "More Hog's Back, I fear? Or Fuller's, my dear?" Fleers he, with a sneer that's sincere! Ahhh, thanks to the good-natured Shoo for humoring me on my new obsession. Last night we took our 2 daughters out to dinner. When the waitress ask what we wanted to drink, I ordered my usual glass of Chardonnay. Shufitz, with a Cheshire Cat smile, ordered a "Hog's Back T.E.A." The befuddled waitress, said, "What? Pardon me?" When his order finally became clear, she brazenly replied, "I do think we have some 'Hog's Back', but it's not beer." Shufitz followed her to the bar. Yet, I knew she was singing in the wind because after several calls and trips to Chicago area liquor stores, I was only able to find 1 pint of Hog's Back T.E.A. in all of Chicagoland (about 6 million people). Sure enough, Shufitz came back with his usual glass of Merlot. However, Shufitz, kudos for trying! [This message was edited by Kalleh on Sun Feb 9th, 2003 at 15:11.] | |||
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Good Lord, she wants me to rhyme! I told her, I haven't the time To sit at this screen Words I must glean I'm glad they left a paradigm! | |||
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On an as yet incomplete tour of the Internet I found THIS LINK TO MORE LIMERICK LOREwhich contains both the "spring / fall" one AND the "flute tutor" one.  Can we say there's nothing new under the (limerick) sun?? [This message was edited by jerry thomas on Sun Feb 9th, 2003 at 18:18.] | |||
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Morgan, you did it!!! See, isn't it fun!   | |||
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Well, let me jump in here. My favorite limericks so far have been LadyBeth's and Hic's: ================================================ LadyBeth There once was a Curate from Kew Who preached with his vestments askew; A lady called Morgan Caught sight of his organ, And promptly passed out in the pew. Lines 1, 2 and 5 rhyme with each other and each contains 8 syllables. Lines 3 and 4 rhyme with each other and each contains 6 syllables. That sounds like the perfect limerick rhyme scheme. ------------------------------------------------- Hic The excuse CJ gives is complex, But the truth of it shouldn't perplex. It wasn't was compunction, But rather, disfunction: De minimis, non curat Rex. Forget about CJ, dear TrossL: Only his ego's collossL. When you can be had By a lusty young lad, Who needs a shriveled old fossL ================================================ I assume the "was" in the second line of the first limerick was a mistake. Great limericks! Here's my attempt: C J was the name of a man. Of puns he was clearly a fan. His bad jokes galore, Limericks and more, Belong in the nearest trash can. Tinman [This message was edited by tinman on Sun Feb 9th, 2003 at 21:50.] | |||
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There once was a man from Romania. Who suffered from cingulomania. He attempted to spoon A young lady named June, And got nothing from her but disdainia. Tinman | |||
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quote: Excellent m. and well deserving of an "A", though allow me to add that yours is the third limerick I have been so impressed with as to issue this grade. Someone said elsewhere that the "F" I gave R.E.'s putrid effort was based on the subject content. Not True! Several limerick writers have seen fit to assail their King. We understand and take no umbrage. On the other hand, "sucking up" is encouraged as long as you don't get soppy about it. Your acknowledgement of me as Wordcrafter King of the limerick is rewarded with the official title of Princess M. (fanfare) The King has spoken. | |||
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quote: First off, I'll restrain myself (barely) from taking the cheap shot about the familiar use of "Robbie" (something along the lines of "You're old enough to have known Mr. Burns on a first name/nickname basis?") and question instead your affirmation that "even" he used it. Even Robert Burns?! The man was a fairly complex writer! I'm sure that he used hundreds of words that 95% of the world would not immediately recognize. But more importantly, are you sure you're even using "aglay" correctly?? In the "best laid plans" quote, it seems to be an adjective. The best laid plans of mice and men gang (go) oft (often) aye aglay (adjective phrase, I think, for "screwed up"). Your "uses language that often aglay" implies that "aglay" would be defined as a verb meaning "goes wrong" (or whatever) which I'm fairly certain is not the case. Scottish is not my long suit but it definately looks like you're overreaching here and coming up considerably short. In any event, limericks are not high prose. They are meant to be enjoyed and how can one do this if the writer purposely uses archaic or obscure language, even assuming he or she uses it correctly? Your grade stays. The King has spoken. | |||
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However, it was based on a number of misunderstandings, both of which I addressed in a response - which, I have to assume, CJ has not yet read. Richard English | |||
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The limerick king lives in a mansion Equipped with equipment for scansion But as everyone knows He does better with prose For a grade he gets Honorable Mention. | |||
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With a fair number of posters here at the same time, this message board is taking on the characteristics of a chat room which, judging from my first experience last Saturday, I'd say was a pretty good thing. R.E., I freely admit that I don't read your posts about beer simply because I don't drink the stuff and life is short. Otherwise, if I don't answer some specific point you make it's probably because either we've gone over it before or I can't find the energy to debate over triffles. If I've missed some major point, I apologize, but sometimes these threads get totally aglayed up. | |||
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quote: HONK!! "mansion," OK, "scansion," fine, "Mention"??!! OOOF! (A bad rhyme is like a punch in the stomach!) "Equipped with equipment" is redundant but no biggie. I do occasionally make use of a rhyming dictionary but if you know where I can find some scansion equipment, I'd be interested. And of course, I disagree with the statement presented but no points off there. And doesn't everyone do better with prose? Still, all in all, not bad. C+ TKHS | |||
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quote: It took a couple of tries to work the meter (or metre; both are correct) of the first line comfortably and a comma after "form" would help but any homage to Ogden Nash written with such craft earns an "A". TKHS | |||
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quote: As your wise and benevolent King, I probably should find something encouraging to say about your limerick but, my goodness, I'm not sure you understand the format. There is a specific meter to be used and it really should rhyme somewhere along the line. Your spelling is excellent. Keep trying! TKHS | |||
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quote: There, now. MUCH better! 1st line, untrue, but no points off. (I seem to be catching all sorts of flak. Ah, well...) 2nd line, I assume the F in "GIF" stands for "foto." No points off for the deliberate misspelling (yet another pet peeve) or for my ignorance regarding exactly what "GIF" means. 3rd line, R.E. needs to be picked on. It's the only exercise he gets. 5th line, yes, I know. The idea of a Kalleh/R.E. mating is so ludicrous that I only innuendoized it for the sake of humor. First limerick score: B+ But is the second half a limerick or just an observation that starts out sounding like a limerick but quickly nosedives into drunken stupordom? Despite what R.E. might say, Lisa, beer is not exactly a health food! TKHS | |||
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While jerry thomas has already pointed this out, the thread is becoming somewhat unwieldy. The confusion with "agley" is that it was misspelled originally as "aglay". It is in fact in dictionary.com and a fairly well-known word. In answer to Shufitz's remark about the "Fly and a Flea in a Flue", all I can say is that my source said that it was written by Ogden Nash. I found it through google on the internet. I presume that I stand corrected. As the self-appointed regulator of the King of Limericks, I must step in and award Richard an A- on his limerick. The F grade has been dutifully withdrawn. The minus is for the confusion regarding the word "agley". I will continue in my role as Limerick Regulator. | |||
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quote: CJ "was" the name of a man. Of puns he "was" clearly a fan. Do I detect a death wish here? Something along the lines of "The King is dead; Long live the King!"?? And such hostility! And after my glowing "Veritable Font" piece, too! Possibly you should seek therapy, maybe the kind where people flail against each other with big foam bats. C- TKHS | |||
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His (self-annointed,self-appointed) Majesty asks: "And doesn't everyone do better with prose?" Correction :::::: Does this float your boat, C J ?? But as everyone knows, When competing with pros, He deserves only Honorable Mention. And ..... speaking of ..... There was a Kid called Sundance, see? Who was bent on increasing abundancy. Being rabid about it He'd frequently shout it "Help stamp out, eschew, and eliminate superfluous repetitive redundancy !!" | |||
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Whoops. And I even looked it up first" Interesting that none of those who took the trouble to post the definition spotted the mistake either! Richard English | |||
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The post was to do with my limerick, not about beer. Richard English | |||
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quote: Such audacity!!! "Limerick Regulator," indeed! Ignoring my initial response (beheadings are so passe) allow me to shortly astound you with my royal generosity. But first, I must make it quite clear that the "F" remains in effect until I deem otherwise and, thank you very much, the post of Limerick Regulator to the King does not exist at the moment and is not likely to in the future. But the fact that you come to R.E.'s defense, risking further rumors about a trans-Atlantic tryst, prompts me to re-evaluate his feeble effort - On the plus side: 1. Strong 1st and 5th lines. 2. It's about me (your King is fair but suck-upabble) 3. Used pre-written 3rd & 4th lines upon request of other poster (I was joking about the plagiarism, R.E.) On the negative side: 1. Misspelled "agley" which led to condusion. 2. More importantly, totally MISUSED "agley" (until it's proven otherwise) as explained above. I'm sure that the otherwise erudite R.E. shares my belief that people who do not understand certain words shouldn't bandy them about as if they did. 3. A mildly insulting piece (again, no points off for that) showing no particular wit or use of imagination, a rather pedestrian effort hardly deserving of an "A". Still... Maybe the "F" was a bit harsh. Upon re-examination, I degree that this piece, while still barely presentable (especially when compared with the rest of the work offered on this board) officially rates a "D" and, if you feel that strongly about it, I'll even go as far as a "D+" but no further. R.E., you can do better (as you have bragged in the past) and I do look forward to awarding you an "A" as soon as you earn one. Now. About my generosity... That play for "Limerick Regulator" was no more than a backdoor attempt to usurp the crown! Kalleh, I'm shocked! And yet I am prepared to allow this ugly incident to pass and, what's more, offer you the title of "Grand Vizier" of my Kingdom. The primary responsibility this job carries is one of go-between for R.E. and myself. You obviously (and, it grieves me to add, somewhat suspiciously) are more simpatico with Richard than I am and so, as an added benefit, this title would extend to all parts of this board, unlike my own Kingship which is in effect only on this thread. In this way, you will be able to carry out another aspect of your position - to explain to R.E. when I'm making a joke so that he may spare himself untold aggravation and time in answering misperceived slights from Your Highness. Plus, as Grand Vizier, I'll be able to keep a closer eye on you. The King has spoken. | |||
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. [This message was edited by TrossL on Thu Jun 5th, 2003 at 7:26.] | |||
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In spending so much damn time on these stupid limericks, I zipped right passed my 500th post on this board without giving you all a chance to throw your monarch a surprise party. My bad, guys. Sorry. Seriously, though, I do detect distinct signs of creeping internet addiction, something I cannot afford due to real world concerns. From here on in, I will try to force myself to stick to a Monday/Wednesday/Friday diet regarding visits to this board. My real work is suffering and, as enjoyable as limericks are (not to mention the verbal fencing that my admitedly presumptuous self-crowning has prompted) I do need to address other matters. If you post something that you want me to address and I don't do so within a day or two, feel free to private topic me and I'll get to it eventually. I don't want to lose track of you - Good subjects are hard to find! | |||
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quote: As "Subject" one would think that you would understand the concept of "a joke." (Kalleh, I may need to expand the scope of your responsibilities.) | |||
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. [This message was edited by TrossL on Thu Jun 5th, 2003 at 7:26.] | |||
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. [This message was edited by TrossL on Thu Jun 5th, 2003 at 7:27.] | |||
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CJ, the definition of "agley" is awry or askew. Certainly it is not inconceivable that your use of language is "agley" at times. So it was used correctly. However, there was a tiny error in that it should have said, "uses language that's often agley", rather than "that often agley"--minor error. Now--let us not get petty about minor errors, dear King. In all seriousness, dear board: I love this thread and would like to save all the limericks somewhere. Is that possible? Also--is anyone else finding this thread a bit unwieldy? Should we start a new one? [This message was edited by Kalleh on Tue Feb 11th, 2003 at 12:32.] | |||
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quote: GIF - Graphic Interchange Format - it's the extension used on filenames for some image files. Is the post of King's Acronym Finder still open ? Purgamentum init, exit purgamentum Read all about my travels around the world here. | |||
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There once was a poet from Oregon, his name a tribute to for-e-gone founder of a city. Oh what a pity the love and the joy are too anon. Princess M. would like to put in her two cents before CJ's critique of this limerick. (Thanks for the 'A' by the way. See, what you get for brown-nosing? Elevated to royalty I am!) I know the pronunciation of foregone is unconventional. And 'anon.' is in the sense of 'anonymous' and doesn't mean 'shortly, in due time' here. I give myself a 'B'. I'm sure you can all guess who this is about. | |||
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quote: Actually, how many threads here containing more than 10 or 20 postings don't stray from the original thought posed in the opening post? The "agley" furor is a fine example. It has nothing to do with limericks and, as such, could have (and maybe even probably should have) been opened up in a separate thread but what can you do? Now, anyway. In the future, might we all agree to open new threads based on ideas that come to us rather than just tack them on willy-nilly to whatever thread it is that inspires that thought? Either way is fine by me. | |||
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